Sexualness

For me, it was simply not wearing panties, or maybe lying on my bed with my legs spread. It definitely included all the panty flashing me and my friends did at school. 

But that doesn’t really describe my “sexualness.” There were other things I used to do. For a start, I would press against boys, especially with my groin. The queues outside a classroom before a lesson were ideal, because there was  always a lot of jostling, and I could get a quick thrill this way. The corners of desks also were a ready source of rubbing! 

Then there was the ribaldry of the girls’ locker room. The teachers who took us for pe/games/gym used to keep a distance when we got changed, and when we showered afterwards. Showers were optional, and some girls were way too shy to use them, but there was something intensely sexual about being naked with a group of girls, all soaping themselves up and teasing each other. “Soap your pussy much more and you’re gonna cum.” Or, “Leave your tits alone. You’ll wear them away.” I think maybe I found it sexual because I am bi, even though I didn’t know that back then. 

One thing I think we all noticed was that WE were noticed. As out bodies changed, so boys (and men) would stare, or try to look down our tops. At first, it felt a bit creepy, but we soon realised that this was power. Our bodies had the power to attract! In turn, this led to many fantasies around what might happen if......

In my case, I admit, I wasn’t just turned on by boys my age trying to cop an eyeful. I wondered what it would be like with an older man. So did many of my friends too. My friend Mary (Catholic school....we had lots of Mary’s and Maria’s) looked like a saint but had THE worst potty mouth said, “An older guy....a MARRIED guy would be perfect. He would know what he’s doing when he fucks me, he wouldn’t dare tell, and he wouldn’t give me an STD.” She had it all worked out, so it was no surprise when she, at the age of 15, lost her cherry to one of the ground staff. Sadly, she hadn’t considered the last of the problems with having sex, and she found herself knocked up! Oops! 

I found erotic literature when I was 14. Reading the dirty words told me that they had a profound effect on me. And so they did. They still do. Every girl likes to be respected, adored, and so do I, but then I also like being told that I’m a dirty fucking whore too! 

As I passed through my pubescent years, I would, like all girls do, compare myself with others. We’re my boobs growing? (Nope. Didn't then....haven’t yet.) Was I getting pubic hair at the ‘right’ time? Oh yes....it fucking exploded. No sooner had I noticed it than it had spread outside my panties, both above the waistband and through the leg holes too. I also discovered what other girls called “claggy pubes”. Natural vaginal secretions dried in my pubes, matting them together, which felt horrid. And before I learned to use tampons, having a blood-soaked sanitary pad down there was the absolute pits. What began as a simple trim, soon saw me removing all my pubic hair and a few months ago, I finished a course of laser removal. 

But I still wondered. Did other girls get as wet as me? So on those times when I skipped Phys. Ed, I would make quite certain I was alone, and then rummage in other girls’ bags and (at first) look in their undies just to see....but that led to me taking a quick sniff too, and in turn that would turn me on. Many was the time I would rub a quick one out with another girl’s undies clamped to my face, but even that changed, and at the moment I came, I might jam her panty crotch between my legs and cum on her panties right where her pussy had been. It thrilled me when I watched her get changed again and pull her panties up tight. 

So, by late 14, 15, I was an avid masturbator and fantasist. I had my own little world of “being sexual”. A friend loaned me a thong because mum wouldn’t buy me any. (“Why on EARTH do you need those at 15?”.......Take a wild guess mum!) It felt weird. I loved the feeling that so little was covering me, but the string between my bum cheeks took some getting used to. Even now, at 20, I rarely wear thongs. I much prefer bikini, or hi-cuts....or nothing! Go figure.

So, given that now I have fucked guys....well...two....and girls.....AND goofed around with my sister, do I still, as Lisa would say, do “Sexualness”? You know, I think I do. There are days when I certainly preen and seek attention, and that makes me wildly randy, even if I don’t get it. I may notice a guy checking me out and ‘accidentally’ spread my legs which causes an instant flood into my underwear. I don’t seem to get wet slowly like other girls. It’s suddenly just...well....there, in great abundance. But that’s ok. It’s fun to see the expression on the face of whoever is watching me. They might think I’ve wet myself, but in my world, that’s good too. 

I’m getting much better at identifying girls who either are, or might be bi. One of my school friends who I still see regularly (or did before this fucking virus) is certainly warming to the idea, although all we have done is masturbated together. 

Let me finish by telling you how that came about.

She and I talk about sex a lot, and she has had more than her fair share of lovers. (Lucky bitch). One day, she was telling me about a particular sex session which put me in mind of a porn clip I had seen recently. I found it and showed it to her. A few minutes in I remarked that if I watched much more, I would have to take care of myself. To my surprise, her hand was already between her legs, up her dress. She didn’t comment, so I lay on the bed beside her and did the same. I could have cum in seconds, but obviously, I needed to hold out. Seeing her hand work under her panties was a terrific turn on. But better was to come when she took her panties off and flicked them onto the floor. I copied her and then her left hand grabbed the inside of my right thigh, and VERY high up. Her little finger actually touched my pussy lip that side. A little pelvic movement from me and her little finger lay neatly in my slit. We both came together. 

I desperately wanted to do more, but as we both came down, she moved her hand, found her panties and pulled them on. “Mmm I needed that!” she purred. I said something dumb like, “Me too.” She didn’t turn the porn off, but unfortunately, she didn’t respond when I said, “Hmmm I could go again.” I decided that maybe actions speak louder than words, so I started to masturbate again. She made no move to do herself, but she did watch me, all the way to my climax. She said, “You look beautiful when you masturbate.” I said, “So do you.” There was a moments silence then she said, “I’ve got you on my little finger.” I could see it glistening from where it had been between my cunt lips. Then she brought it to her face. For a moment I was wild with excitement at the thought that she might lick it off, but instead, she sniffed at it and said, “You smell great too.” 

And that was that. Owing to Covid we haven’t seen each other since. But next time.....oh next time.....if I can’t get us into a mutual masturbation position, it will be my hand touching her, and we shall see where we go from there! 

Fuck....horny as hell now.....got to sort myself out.