Horrible Handjob

At the time I wrote the post, I was seriously interested in 'glans blame.' That's one of the names for the activity in which someone rubs the palm of their hand over a man's glans, the tip of his penis.  If you've never had it done, you're in for either a treat, or a terror. It starts off as a kind of severe tickle that you can't stand. It's so bad you can't do it to yourself. You won't stand for it.  Ideally, you'll be tied down so you can't squirm away. This tickle is really difficult to accommodate, yet it is harmless. It's not some kind of extreme sexual play in which a person could become injured.

When I was a kid, I found a darkroom timer in the trash. I didn't know what it was, but it worked, and could set it for a number of minutes and seconds. It would run and then beep when the amount of time was reached. The neighbor kid and I played a game in which we'd set it for a specific amount of time, then we'd rub the other guy's glans until the timer beeped. First it was like 30 seconds, but then we worked up to seven minutes each.  For the first couple of minutes, you really can't stand the feeling. It's a real challenge. You continue with it only to see how much you can take. Then you start getting used to it and it changes. It becomes sort of a cross between a 'gotta pee' feeling and a 'gonna cum' feeling. There's nothing else quite like it. Generally, neither happens, but sometimes, the kid or I would lose it and involuntarily pee. Sometimes the urine would just be a little squirt amounting to a few drips. Sometimes it was like opening a faucet. Once started, you can't stop peeing until you're empty. Every now and then one of us would cum, but that was rare. We'd stay in a sort of pre-orgasmic state. Really quite nice.

Of course, after the glans rubbing, we'd have the the other guy stroke us to a beautiful orgasm. Fast forward to the day I posted. I was specifically looking for someone who would give me some good, solid glans rubbing. I was sure I wanted that. A guy answered my post. We emailed back and forth a few times. I determined that he was safe. I got to his house. After a bit of small talk, he had me take off my clothes, while he remained clothed. He said he didn't want any attention, this was all for me. There are guys like that in the world. They just love playing with dick, and yet, they don't need, don't even want reciprocation. Maybe they have body dysmorphia and don't want to be seen. Perhaps they think their penis is too small. If only they knew: It doesn't matter. They could be played with by people who would appreciate their idiosyncrasies. In this case, I was delighted. What an offer: To be played with, without having to play back.

So, in our emails, I let the guy know exactly what I wanted: Very lightly fondle my balls and my dick until I become hard. Put some oil on his hands. Then start in on the glans rubbing. For those who don't know, the 'tickle' is even worse with oil than dry. You'd think it would be the opposite. But the main thing is that the oil prevents chaffing, something I discovered with my neighbor as a boy. There was to be no safeword. After all, this is not like testicle squeezing or fisting, where there's any real danger. So, I get on the guy's bed all naked. I was soft. You'd think I'd start right out with a raging erection, but no, it takes me a while to get erect with a new guy. Maybe it's because in my younger years, I was in places where having an erection in front of someone would be a bad thing. Like boys' locker rooms, or conservative nude beaches. So, I've subconsciously learned to keep it soft at first.

The guy started in. But he didn't start out with gentle touching. He just grabbed my soft dick and started pumping up and down. It hurt. I had to tell him to stop, and start out more gently. For a moment he complied, then he resumed wildly jerking me off. I became resigned to what he wanted to do. It stopped hurting and I did become erect after a short while. The minute I was fully erect, he started in on the glans rubbing. He didn't hold back. He was rubbing with long, firm strokes. It was terrible! I had dreamed of a sweet but somewhat gentle torture. Instead this was the real deal. It was unbearable! I was squirming all over the place.

The major part of me wanted to tell him to slow down, or take off the pressure, or just plain stop. But I was reminding myself that this was what I came for, and the intensity was what I had thought I wanted. I had been hoping for a very intense session. Now that my dream was coming true, it was more of a nightmare. It was excruciating. I can't remember clearly, but I'm pretty sure I wasn't having fun. Well, maybe, part of me was enjoying it. Maybe the part that had fantasized about how nice it was going to be. Well, was it nice? I wasn't so sure.

After a couple of minutes, the feeling did settle down. Now, I was starting to enjoy the guy's ministrations, and true to my previous experiences, it became less of a horrible tickle, and more of the slow welling up of a gunna cum feeling. The pre-orgasmic feeling got stronger. I said, "I'm gonna cum," thinking he may quit rubbing with his palm and stroke me to a nice finish. But no, he suddenly increased the speed and pressure. The intensity returned. In fact, It was starting to fucking hurt! At the same time, it was sexually amazing, and I did ejaculate. That moment was actually nice.

He kept going as if nothing different was happening, my cum adding to the lubrication. The orgasm was short lived. He rubbed on, still with greater speed and intensity. I was done in that way that all guys know: After you cum, you immediately don't want any more sexual attention. I said, "Stop." He kept going. The tip of my penis was starting to sting. I yelled, "STOP!" He kept going. Finally, I was so sure I had had enough that I pulled up really hard and got off the bed, immediately throwing my clothes back on. I thanked him, and left as soon as I could.

Once home, I took a look at my dick. There was redness on the tip. He had chaffed me, even with the oil. It took a few days to heal, during which jerking off had to be done carefully so it wouldn't hurt. In retrospect, I enjoyed the experience in a sort of perverse way. I would never go back to that guy because he really didn't communicate well. He didn't do it the way I had expressed that I wanted. It was seriously too intense. But, I have done that with a few guys since then, and it has worked out much better. With the other guys, except for one, I reciprocated. I did it more gently of course, monitoring their responses so I knew they were having a good time. Most did love the glans rubbing. Some didn't, so I just switched to testicle massage, jerking them off, whatever they wanted. My wife will do it for me sometimes, but she's usually too gentle. She thinks she's hurting me. I cannot manage to express to her that I love the intensity.

That's my dick in the picture. As you can see, there was no permanent damage.