This is short, and some will say silly. But it is tearing me apart. I don't want these feelings, but I don't know what to do to control them.
All he did was hug me. I hugged him back. Just a simple hello between friends. If only he knew. Between my legs I was on fire. I know now the meaning of 'creaming' myself. This was no mere gentle and wanted arousal, this was a sudden uncontrollable gush of wetness that was enough to wet my knickers through AND my jeans too. As soon as I sat back in my car I could smell myself.
They say don't drive angry, well I did. All the way home. I carved several people up and shot at least four red lights. I was soooo fucking annoyed!!
Back in my bedsit I paced around, furious. How DARE he do that to me. He is married and I have no intention of being the other woman. Yet, I lust after him so much. I needed to remind myself of how humiliated I felt. I opened my legs and looked at the wetness creeping outwards and was utterly disgusted with myself.
I peeled my t shirt off and then my jeans. For fucks SAKE! It looked exactly like I had pissed myself. Then came my knickers. Soaked through and through and smelling musky.
I tossed them in the hamper with, if anything, my hatred for him and what he had done to me with a simple hug climbing ever higher.
I flopped onto my bed and stared wild eyed at the ceiling. I became aware of how my jaw was aching from clenching my teeth in anger and how deep my breathing was. I said out loud 'You fucking BASTARD'. I decided I needed to remember how angry I was, but I can't remember reaching to my bedside table. I can't even remember spreading my legs. I certainly have no memory of the moment I took the banana and started to fuck myself with it. But then, I felt the orgasm building and I was fucking myself so hard and fast, not in any way lovingly, but violently, savagely. If the banana were a guy, he would have been raping me. I didn't want this. I didn't want to feel this good over HIM. I started not only fucking myself but twisting it around inside me. As the orgasm burst from between my legs, I called his name. 'YOU FUCKING CUNT. YOU FUCKING ARSEHOLE'.
The orgasm was like being ripped apart. I came and came and came. Liquid shot from deep inside me onto the bed, soaking my hands and running down the crack of my bum.
I pulled the fruit from inside me and threw it away, disgusted with myself.
Then I turned off my video camera and filed the film. Next time when I know I will see him I will replay this and remind myself of the humiliation he forced upon me.
I am well brought up and highly educated. I am a company director, even at my relatively young age. I am in control. How DARE he do this to me. I hate him....
...but I know that, at the moment, if I had the chance, I would be his whore. I would kneel, bound and gagged, at his feet. I would let him, no, I would BEG him to humliate me in the worst ways imaginable. I would let him sell my body, anything he wanted. I would walk naked through the streets of Brighton if he demanded it of me. There is nothing I would deny him, in fact, I would thank him for it.