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What You SHOULD Teach Your Sons About Masturbation

Posted by: Age: 33 Posted on: 5 comments
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What you SHOULD teach your sons about masturbation, erections, puberty, wet dreams, etc.

 

So you have a son? That son has a penis. That penis will become erect sometimes. It will even ejaculate! Oh my god!

What makes people so apprehensive about dealing with their sons when it comes to puberty, erections, masturbation, etc.

Let's start at the beginning, erections. Your son is going to experience many erections in his lifetime. It's not uncommon for young babies to get erections. This is a good thing for parents because you can approach this subject from an early age, an age when boys are less embarrassed about such things. They are are probably confused as to why it's become erect and what it all means. So what
should you tell them about erections? You can simply say "As a boy your penis will get erect sometimes. It may be because you are excited or it may be because you need to use the toilet." It's important to use the correct terms like "penis" and "erection" instead of words like "pee pee" or "winky". Let them know that it's normal and happens to all boys and will still happen when they get older and become a man.

The most important thing that you should tell your sons, which nobody ever does, is that they should not hide their erections by way of pushing it down or bending it uncomfortably. Most boys, especially in the teenage years when erections are more frequent, tend to hide the penis when it is hard by restricting it's upright angle. By pushing the penis down it can seriously damage the delicate internal tissues and that could be a serious problem later in life. Also, pushing it to the side could cause tears inside that may eventually lead to a build up of penile plaque and curvatures of the erection. Obviously they don't want to walk around with a tent forming in their trousers, they need a way of reducing it's visibility without causing themselves any discomfort. The way to accomplish this is to position the penis straight up, pointing towards the belly button. It can then be tucked into the waistband of the underwear or trousers.

This brings me to a side point, underwear. You should buy your son loose fitting underwear like boxer shorts. Briefs and boxer briefs are tighter fitting around the crotch and don't leave much room for the erection. This can cause unnecessary pain when the penis is restricted. However, the tighter underwear will be more supportive though and will hold the penis upright better when erect and pointing towards the belly button. Tell your son that he should not feel embarrassed when he gets an erection, just subtly adjust it upwards to reduce the chance of someone seeing it.

Puberty. This is a scary and strange time for your son. Your son will learn about puberty at school, but this shouldn't be the only source of information that your son receives though. You should tell him about the changes he can expect before they happen. You should tell him that his body will change, he will grow hair in new places, his voice will break and his testicles will drop.

He may also experience nocturnal emissions or wet dreams as they are commonly known. Not all boys have wet dreams, and that's okay, but if a boy wakes up after having a wet dream and not knowing what it means, that can be a very scary occurrence. Tell your son that when the testicles drop, they start producing semen. Semen is stored in the testicles and young boys, when their hormones start revving up, produce more semen than at any other time in their lives. When enough semen is produced, the body may expel some during deep sleep. This may or may not accompany a sexy dream.

Masturbation. Your son will masturbate, get over it! You are better off preparing your son for masturbation and instilling a healthy attitude towards it. This will in turn create a healthy attitude towards sex when he is older. You should tell your son that it is absolutely normal and nothing to be ashamed of, but it is a personal, private activity that the whole world doesn't need to know about. You could say "Son, one day you are going to discover masturbation and you will love it. It is healthy and normal and everyone does it from time to time". When your son starts masturbating, he will do it a lot! If you are a mother, you will not understand the raging hormones of a young boy going through puberty. He may start spending a long time in the bathroom or the shower. He may prefer his own room and be in there for hours on end. Some boys will masturbate 7-8 times per day, don't freak out, this is normal. Some boys will do it less but usually at least once per day. They should be allowed time to themselves and never interrupted or made to feel ashamed. Placing a simple lock on their bedroom reaffirms this and lets them know they have a private place to enjoy and discover themselves.

It would be a good idea to purchase some supplies for your son to use, tissues, towels, personal lubricant, etc. Explain that when a boy masturbates, semen will be ejaculated and this can stain clothing and bed sheets. Give him the tissues to catch the ejaculate which can then be cleanly discarded down the toilet, not in the waste bin which will cause a stale odour. The towels are for himself to clean himself afterwards and he should be encouraged to put them into the washing basket and not feel ashamed or embarrassed about it. You could even show him how to use the washing machine which will come in handy as he gets older. Encourage your son to use the personal lubricant when he masturbates. If your son is uncircumcised then he would otherwise use the loose skin of the foreskin to slide up and down over the glans penis, this requires a tighter grip and over time will deaden the nerves of the penis and he will enjoy masturbation and sex less and less. This is sometimes referred to as Death Grip Syndrome. Dry masturbation will also increase the possibility of penile plaque forming on the shaft. Supplying these things for your son should not be embarrassing, it is a way of showing that you care for him and fully understand that he is becoming a man.

Pornography. At some point your son will find or actively seek out porn, it's going to happen. In this day in age porn is so easily accessible that it can sometimes be found by accident with a misspelled search word in google. Porn can be anything from pictures of women wearing little or no clothing, to videos of intercourse all the way to visual acts of extreme punishment. He will be curious, it is human nature. Treat him like an adult, I would explain what porn is. It is fake. It is over the top fantasy. In some cases it depicts scenarios that are illegal. Explain that the images and scenes are staged and people are paid to act as though are enjoying themselves, when sometimes they are not. Men and boys are visually stimulated creatures and porn can be very alluring. It can be addictive and some men prefer the easily accessible world of porn to actually meeting real women and experiencing actual sex. By talking to your son about porn at an early age you are more likely to instil a mature understanding towards sex and that will help him greatly in the future.

Your son will find and view pornography, fact. My advice is to give him a magazine subscription. Magazines have pictures of women without any of the explicitness that he would find on the internet. This will encourage him to use more of his imagination show that you understand his needs as a growing boy. Explain that it's okay to look at such things, but sometimes it's good to just enjoy yourself without any visual stimulation. The brain can become addicted or desensitized to visual imagery so your son should be encouraged to rely on his imagination for at least 50% of his masturbation sessions.

Men's magazines will also help him develop as a man. They include features on exercise, hygiene, grooming, fashion, etc. It's not all titillation!

I hope that you take the time and responsibility of talking to your sons regarding these difficult matters and helping him to grow and mature into a man with healthy desires and attitudes to sex and relationships. The world is a sexual minefield and it's our jobs to help our sons navigate their way through it.

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