Shift Your Mind To Tease And Entice

We live in an instant gratification society. Think about it -- you probably can't go more than a few minutes without reaching for your cell phone. Studies show that we now have an attention span of 8 seconds. With this in mind, it's clear why many of us have a sexual disconnect -- finding it hard to stay in the moment without performance anxiety, hangups and dysfunction getting in the way. To really bring the sensuality and fire back into your bed, you need to come back home to your body. When you can stand in your own energy without getting jittery, uncomfortable in your skin and lost in fantasy, you and any woman you share a bed with can enjoy sexual bliss you likely haven't seen. With this, it's important that you adopt the mindset of being a giver in the bedroom -- opening her mind and essence so that her body follows. First you'll need to get used to grounding your arousal and taking on a relaxed state. From here, breathe slow and deep, allowing yourself to feel the sensations of being turned on. If you have an erection, breathe deeply and let yourself feel which areas of your penis are most stimulated. When you have grounded your energy and found comfort in your present state of arousal, you can then adopt a giving mindstate, using your sexual fire to stimulate her mind and body. Start with making sure you have no outside distractions. In a world where technology is pinging our senses every minute of our waking life, going dark from it and shutting yourselves off from the outside world brings its own sense of danger and intimacy. Cut your phones off, unplug all the clocks and cut the lights out. Time doesn't exist. Use rainymood.com to provide ambient sound, but make sure it doesn't drown out the sound of each others' breathing. Begin with light kisses, allowing the energy to build, and making note of the soft definition of her lips and tongue. Stay present as you kiss along the nape of her neck, listening to her body language and moans to figure out where she wants to be touched. Once you've both stripped down to the nude, lead the dance, telling her to roll over onto her stomach. With her stretched out and comfortable, let yourself feel what you appreciate about her body. Kiss the back of her calves and allow your tongue to taste the texture of her skin. Let your breath and verbal cues express how delightful her flesh tastes, and take time to tease her before moving to the next body part. If you and your lady have been in a rut, or have been skipping foreplay for some time, you both may have the urge to rush ahead several steps and jump straight to sex. Resist that urge. If she grows impatiently horny, breathe deeply into the moment and relax. Opt instead to keep taking your time and building that red hot tension. Stay present as she burns hotter and becomes more wildly expressive. Setting the tone in itself is hot, and your patience will be rewarded when the two of you connect in ways that you never allowed yourselves to before. Building this tension allows you to be completely uninhibited so that you can let your true desires play out. But it's all about adopting the right mindset. Think of her more as a juicy piece of fruit you want to savor, taste, and experience for as long as your senses can stand it. You can't lose with this mindset, no matter what you decide to explore in your bedroom.