My First Orgasm / Ejaculation

I was so behind in my sexual education that I thought for sure my parents were made by machines. The little I knew of sex, I thought there was no way my parents did that.

By the time my father had "the talk" with me, around 13 or 14, about the birds and the bees I was too old and had already figured things out myself and that talk we had was very uncomfortable for me. It should have been done much earlier IMO.

Anyway, when I was left alone at home, I knew where my parents hid the key to their bedroom and I would sneak in there and find my dad's Playboy magazines and my mom's vibrator.

I would get an erection and use the two C-battery powered vibrator on the side of my hard cock, it felt great! I had used it many times, before when I got the chance, but this day was going to be much different than the other times I used it.

One day in 1975 or 1976 my parents and brother went out of town and I stayed home by myself. I was sitting in my father's recliner in the living room naked from the waist down and started using the vibrator on my erection. This intense, very pleasurable feeling started building up as I slowly moved the tip of the vibrator up and down the side of my cock. Then all of a sudden I felt like I was going to explode with pleasure. And unfortunately I had no idea what was happening to me.

The next thing I know I started having very intense spasms and this white fluid stuff started squirting and streaming out of my cock. As incredibly good as it felt, I was absolutely horrified. I thought I hurt myself very badly, blew some pipes or something very bad. Bad enough that I considered calling an ambulance. It was a very traumatic experience for me! Just Terrible!! When it SHOULD have been the exact opposite and an amazingly pleasurable experience!

I smelled the white stuff that shot out of me. It smelled musky and weird, and I had no clue what it was. It was totally horrible.

I should have been taught these things by someone other than my parents. I really wish an older guy or girl would have turned me onto sex, explaining what I would be experiencing. They could have explained to me what sex is and what making babies was all about. That way I would have known what was happening to me and I could have totally enjoyed my very first orgasm with cum!!

Once I figured out that I was OK, I remembered how incredibly good it felt building up to the climax. And I wanted to do it over and over again! And that is exactly what I did. I don't think I ever put the vibrator back in my parent's room. That sucker was mine, they could figure they lost it or whatever and buy another one.

Then one day in middle school, a classmate of mine named Terry F. was in the school stairwell yelling, "Beat off," over and over again and it echoed loudly. I was thinking what the hell does "beat off" mean?

Then one day I was in the bathroom at home sitting on the toilet with my pants down. I got my cock hard and remembered hearing "Beat Off" being yelled in the stairwell and somehow I just figured it out by wrapping my right hand around my cock and started to "beat off" in an up and down motion and it felt great. The next thing I know I shoot a load and I was thrilled I figured out a way to cum without needing the vibrator!!

As it turned out, I did not lose my virginity until one month before my 22nd birthday. I was very shy and unsure of myself with girls. I knew many of my friends were having sex and I wasn't.

I am not sure how that crazily sad first orgasm affected me mentally and sexually. It could not have done anything good for me, that's for damn sure.

I am 60 years old as I write this and I have not had sex for over 10 years other than "Beating Off". I had no sex with anyone through my entire 50's! I had several chances to have sex with women during the 14 years working at a liquor store but didn't.

I just don't know. I am a very horny and sexual person, I guess I just don't want to do what it takes to get some pussy. I have always had a mild anti-social aspect of my personality plus being shy and overweight doesn't help with my self-esteem either when it comes to the opposite sex.

I really hope one day SOON I can snap out of this and be more normal and regular in my sexuality with others.

In the meantime, Thank Goodness for masturbation!!!