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My First Experiences

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In my family when i grew up, sex was a taboo subject. No one explained anything to me. In 7th & 8th grade,some of the other boys-especially the older ones who had been held back-always talked about jerking off and "cumming". I was too embarrased to admit that I had no idea what they were talking about. Often when I would take my bath at about age 13, my penis would get very big and hard while I was washing it. It felt really good to wash it, so I spent time taking care that my penis was very clean! One day in the tub I noticed that as I was washing my penis, I was finding more and more pleasurable and that it was more difficult to breathe. My whole body began to feel good. I used plenty of soap and water to keep on rubbing and stroking myself as I rubbed my penis, thighs, stomach and butt. I was lost in the moment-seemed like an hour. All of a sudden I felt like I was going to pee or something but long white strands of some thick white liquid started squirting out of my penis as I panted and felt my entire body at first relax then go limp. I started to yell for help! When my dad came into the bathroom, I showed him the white stuff all over the bathtub and my hands and told him I thought I was sick. He got very embarrassed and turned red. He told me I was OK and to get out of the tub and dry off. I was crying by now even though I felt so good all over. When I went into my room, there was a paperback book on my bed called, "A Father Talks to His Son About the Facts of Life". It was written by a Catholic priest for good Catholic dads to give to their sons. Too little too late for me. My dad remained embarrased to talk about sex so we only had vague minimal conversations. At least I learned that I wasn't sick and would live. I always seemed to get hard when I saw guys on TV that I thought were handsome but not when I saw girls. I had guilt about masturbating (learned from my reading)and tried to curtail my feelings. I desired at an early age to have a man's penis in my mouth and vice versa. I didn't know yet that's what my freinds talked about when they said "blow job". I was able when masturbating to curl my back against the wall and my tongue touched the tip of my penis-I often ejaculated on my face and in my own mouth. I loved it so much that to this day I love thae taste of licking up my own ejaculate. At age 14, a friend of mine (John) and I got together and were looking at nude pics from a "girlie magazine" in the woods near my home. He got hard and so did I thinking about what I wanted to ask him. I didn't have to ask. He saw me looking at him masturbate and asked if I would do it to him so I did. After he came, he was flustered--his first experience of being jerked off. I was extremely turned on and masturbated by myself 3 more times that day. As the years passed by, I found myself more and more attracted to men but stayed closeted by dating girls--no sexual interest or contact--as a good "Catholic Boy". In my high school library, a friend Mark knew about me from my friend John telling him how I jerked him off. Mark used to drop his pencil under the table at library class and ask me to pick it up for him. When I did, he would have his big hard penis exposed and would wiggle it at me under the table. I was embarrassed and didn't want people to think I was gay, so I avoided taking him up on his offers to let me suck it after school for him. I dropped many hints to some friends I thought I could trust and had various masturbation experiences with guys in the woods. Finally, my friend Eddie told me it was OK to be gay and that he knew a guy he could fix me up with. That's how I met Bobby. He was 26 and I was 17 ( I had no idea about age restricitions when I was younger). One day I met Bobby with Eddie and his girlfriend at her home. Bobby and I set up a date and I picked him up in my blue mustang. We went parking in an area that ironically 20 years later was on the land where I built my home for my now ex-wife and 3 children (that's another whole story). That's where I got my first and most memorable blow job and finally got to put a man's penis in my mouth and believe me--I enjoyed every second--including both of our loud and forceful climaxes.

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