Handwork Advice for Ladies and Anyone Else Who Cares to Read

Ok this is going to get personal. Very personal. I have written this as sound advice for anyone who may be interested, but primarily younger females who may be getting to grips with the male member for the first time, or just those looking to broaden their knowledge and skills. Yes, the penis can be daunting for the uninitiated, but I love to share and to help, and so here I am. One of the main points I can make is that every man is different, we all react to slightly different stimuli, and so what works for one man may not quite work for another. The main penile response is a little more subtle and complex than first appears. In this porn is both a blessing a curse. The classic scenario we have probably all seen of the female pornstar vigorously rubbing the shaft up and down may look good, but in my experience it is of limited value. I will say outright that most if not all of my previous female lovers have had initially poor handwork skills until I showed them how to do it. Unfortunately rubbing too hard, too vigorously and too fast is counter-productive and may be painful to your male partner unless you approach things a little more carefully. As I said, porn is fortunately a blessing a well as there is plenty of amateur male masturbation material out there. Simply watch how men like to pleasure themselves, and compare several sources from either internet porn or other anecdotal sources so that you have a good idea of what you are doing and can feel much more confident about your manual skills. I am writing this because I want to help you as reader and help you enjoy your erotic life still more! Communication is key of course, you and your man should be as relaxed, unhurried and emotionally intimate as you possibly can be. In fact, don’t start your lovemaking or handwork session until you are both in that place, it’s really important. Don’t hurry, as this can be really counter-productive. The response of your male partner may vary hugely according to how relaxed he is, the immediate physical circumstances such as room temperature, and his age, degree of physical fitness and virility. However, we men are good at giving out non-verbal signals when becoming aroused, all you have to do is to latch on to and respond to them. If something doesn’t quite work, then try subtle variations as you are probably closer to the mark than you think. Smiles. So on to the main course, I will now tell you about some sure fire male masturbation techniques which in my experience as a man will always work. Use lube where you can, but pre-cum can also be effective once you are beyond first base. Warm, soft hands are very helpful, and you should ensure that your fingernails are in good state too. Long, well-manicured nails can be very effective for a specific grazing stimulation, though they should never be too sharp. Your first job will to make your man hard, and this is best done by varying light and heavier caresses using a combination of thumb and second and third finger pressure points. Caress, stroke, glide your thumb and fingertips across the shaft in multiple directions. Experiment, and see what works for him. Resist the temptation to take the shaft between thumb and forefinger in order to stroke the whole shaft too quickly, and let your man’s erection grow naturally. The combination of lube and those soft warm hands should do the trick. This is really where you can experiment and give your man a lot of pleasure. This fingertip masturbation is all about the degree and angle and speed of pressure that you apply. As you progress, that fingertip pressure should become more continuous, more firm. Through your fingertips you will feel the vibrational sensations you are creating in his shaft. The longer the continuous sensation, the more pleasurable it will be for him. I personally am very responsive to a slow firm circular movement using the  thumb and the second and third forefingers on that pressure point just below the head. For those not in the know, this is always the most sensitive area of the cock, and where you can give considerable pleasure as that pressure stimulation will be travelling right up and down his shaft and he will absolutely love it. There are other areas of the shaft where this technique also work, and a side to side caressing motion across the underside of the shaft can be very good also, but this is the one where you will masturbate your man the most efficiently. You can do something similar on the glans or head of the cock, but do bear in mind that your lover’s skin is particularly sensitive there. If giving manual stimulation to the glans then definitely use the lube and soft hands technique, as you can cause some discomfort if you are clumsy. Forming a cap using the palm of your hand over the head of the cock is highly pleasurable, especially if you use a slow corkscrew stimulation movement. Given its sensitivity, the head of the penis is also extremely susceptible to oral stimulation, but that is a whole different topic of conversation.  Do check in with your partner very regularly, ask him how things are going, and check with him if you are doing ok or need to make any adjustments, especially if you are learning your craft. You can mix things up too, revert to mouth on mouth or whole body kissing if you feel the need. Only when you feel that your man is quite hard should you take things on to the next stage. This would be an ideal opportunity to slip on a cock ring or condom and to move on to vaginal intercourse, but if you want to continue down the hand work route then you will probably need to change position. I personally like to receive handwork laid down on the bed with my partner laid next to me, but there are variants. I do like to have my girlfriend sitting astride me, perhaps facing away but facing me can also be very good for the intimacy and eroticism which eye contact bring. Dirty talk, and lots of it, is a sure fire winner so express yourself with as much verve and confidence as you can muster. I personally need 10 – 15 minutes of unhurried masturbation to get to this stage of really being fully erect and possibly quite close to orgasm. Where you want to take things from here is very much up to you, given the choice I like about 30 minutes of masturbation before I feel I really can’t hold back any longer, but you may be pressed for time. From here, the most effective masturbation technique is to take the base of the shaft in your weaker hand, reasonably firmly to prevent sperm entering the shaft before you are both ready for him to climax. With your stronger hand you are then able to perform the main masturbation, and this should be in the form of long, slow strokes the full length of the shaft. This is where you can really go to town, again don’t rush, experiment and get a sense of what he really likes, a multitude of verbal and oral indicators will give you a clear sense of how things are going. Your thumb and forefinger should form a relatively loose ring around his shaft, though you may need to adjust a little as you go along. The classic mistakes are to grip too hard and to stroke too fast, and again the plethora of porn films are very misleading in this area. I would say that one full stroke every one to two seconds is about right, but always check in to see if the speed is OK for him. Communicate communicate communicate and you can’t go wrong. This form of handwork is also very erotic because your man is giving you complete control, so make use of it to experiment and to express yourself sexually. It also lends itself perfectly to bondage, have your man tied up on the bed before you really go to work on him and you can wreak havoc on his erotic sensibilities through the pleasure you are giving him. As an added twist, gag your man with your panties while you bring off manually, this works for me every time. I have recently discovered the joys of using a small 8 inch vibrator on my shaft also. Jeez what have I been missing out on ladies? A year or two ago I experimented with my partner’s rather old-fashioned mains powered vibrator, it wasn’t too bad but the vibrations were a little too heavy and powerful. I absolutely love the smaller chargeable model I have got myself though. By no means should they be restricted to the vagina and clitoris as they can also give a man considerable pleasure! Again, it doesn’t have to be too strong a pressure, you can produce very stimulating effects by changing the length of time, point and degree of pressure, very similar to the techniques I have described above. As the stimulation is so powerful, especially when skilfully applied, you can make your man climax this way pretty quickly should you choose to do so. A sustained pressure of more than a few seconds can have this effect unless you are careful, so this is excellent for edging. Of course the closer  you bring your man to orgasm through edging the less room for manoeuvre you will have, so it will take ever-increasing amounts of skill to keep him just below that tipping point. Of course, the more you practise the better you will get, and this applies to all the other wonderful lovemaking techniques too.   Orgasm. When you are both ready then you should finish your lover off with firm, steady, unhurried strokes. It really should feel like a milking action, steadiness of rhythm is really important at this point. Quite apart from producing the most pleasurable and fulfilling orgasms, once he realises that you have got him exactly where you want him, and you are about to bring him over the edge with these steady, unhurried movements and that there is absolutely nothing he can do about it, this will be pretty mind-blowing for him. It is also very trusting and intimate, for me exactly the right kind of intimacy that all the best lovemaking should be about. A couple of really important and often overlooked points: don’t stop the hand stimulation too soon! Keep that steady milking motion going for as long as you need to, and definitely until you are sure he is quite spent, otherwise much of the delicious effect of that orgasmic release will be lost. Once your lover is completely spent and the cock quite limp you should then steadily but not suddenly withdraw the manual stimulation, as the penis is extremely sensitive post orgasm. This is also where your man is, in any situation, most vulnerable, and think about gentle, loving and sensitive ways to bring him down to earth. You should get very comfortable and familiar with the process of your man’s climax. It is just a matter of getting used to it, engaging with it and enjoying the process. It is an incredibly intimate moment when handled with due skill and sensitivity, so enjoy that intimacy! Become familiar with the sight and taste and odour of cum, and take as much pleasure in his orgasm as much as you would your own. It is a precious fluid, unique to your man, to be tasted, licked up, swallowed and rubbed in. By all means it can appear strange and unusual at first, and every woman has her own tastes and sensibilities, but there is really nothing around the male orgasm that you should feel in any way uncertain of or uncomfortable with. Of course the more you practise and the more you become experienced, the easier all of this becomes. I personally like to ejaculate for my partner and I definitely have an exhibitionist streak in me, all part of showing off my virility and ability to cum copiously which is actually really important to a man. However, it means so much more to know that my partner is willingly engaging with me and as relaxed and confident with the situation as I am.   Well, I hope that my words do some good somewhere. I am always happy to answer any further questions, as really I just want to help, new and developing lovers in particular. Keep safe, healthy and happy.