Decandent and Totally Self-absorbing

Its been a heavy few days. Lots of shit awful flights at shit awful times, and to some shit awful airports with some shit awful captains. I am glad that I have a week off now. I arrived home very early this morning, somewhere around 3:20 am. Unfortunately, I found it impossible to go to sleep. Sometimes, the previous days just run around my brain and make sleep impossible. I need to discharge the angst of the working day and relax into being me. So, what better way than to relax INSIDE me? Masturbate myself to sleep? Of course, ... ah, but how. So many posibilities and so many variations? Oh, I hope my brain doesnt keep flitting from one scenario to another, I can rarely cum when it does that. I walk to my closet, and run my tired eyes through the clothes hanging there. Why, I dont know, but my eyes kept returning to my uniform. I had only take it off a few hours ago, though why I have the strangest urge to put it back on, heaven knows! Still, I reach for the shirt, jacket and tie and slip them on. They smell of me, of sweat, and that peculiar 'jet' smell that often lingers so long. My hand reaches for the skirt, but instead, acting on an unvoiced command, I select a much shorter black skirt instead. Then, oh yes, then the panties. Fresh ones from the drawer? No. Not this time. I reach for the pair I took off before my bath. The pair I have been forced to wear for two days now. They are blue, almost like school knickers, but briefer around the waste. They are still damp. I hold them as my nipples engage in a carress with my shirt. I can see my stains on them, and they smell of me. Totally of me; of the cream from my pussy, and a faint hint of pee. I step into them and pull the cold dampness against me. I feel my clit harden almost instantaneously. I have left my hair down, and I look at myself in the mirror. I look sultry, no, actually, I look like a whore; like a woman who needs a slap! I take my own advice and let my right hand slap me hard on the ass. Feels good. So I di it again, really hard and savage, but it doesnt do what I need. I reach for the phone and I phone Sarah. Can she come over? Now? A short while later Sarah walks in through my open door and finds me sprawled over my bed, on knee practically on the floor, the other on my bed like I was humping the side of the matress. (something I used to love doing when I was 13!) Sarah totally understands. She picks up one of my slippers and walks towards me. I turn my face away from her. I dont want to know what she is going to do, or WHEN. She stands behind me. I know I dont smell freshly bathed, I smell of work, a little of sweat, and a little of cunt! I hear the slipper swish through the air and I feel the sting as it catches the back of my leg. Fuck, that HURT! I gasp. Then, she does it again, this time catching the cheek of my ass with only the very TIP of the slipper. A lancet of pain skewers through my ass. It shocks me so much that I let a little pee go into the panties. Sarah has her hand between my legs and is pressing my clit ring through the material. She feels her hand wet. "You fucking slut. Youve pissed on my hand!" Again the slipper arcs through the air, again and again it stings me. Sarah reaches for my hair and winds it around her fist. She jerks my head backwards. "You dirty little cunt! You're coming with me." She pulls me by my hair down the stairs and through the lounge to the patio. She leaves me there while she ignites the patio heaters. Then, again by the hair, she drags me outside. "Stand the fuck UP." She pulls me to the wall, placing my hands against it like a suspect in a police drama. She lifts my skirt up over my ass and again, slaps me, although this time with her hand. Her head is close to my ear. She whispers degrading and delicious things to me as she chastises me. "You dirty little slut. You havent had a bath for two days have you? You know, you stink of cunt. Any man within a hundred miles of you could smell your hole! You can barely contain your piss either. Look, you've even wet your own panties." Every fibre of me feels alive. Sarah takes a seat and says "Hey, cunt, turn around and look at me." I obey her and I see she has her legs apart and is rubbing herself off. "you know, your not going to touch me unless I tell you, you fuck piece... AND... your not going to touch YOURSELF until, and IF I give you permission." The effect is electric. Suddenly, my clit demands to be touched. I can even feel my pussy widenning inside me aching for the penetration it may not have. Sarah orgasms twice, three times, four times. Then she says, "Lie down cunt" I lie down on the patio. (Sarah starts to fill the hot tub) I can smell her arousal. I swear I am almost cumming as I greedilly suck the traces of her scent into my head. Then, Sarah stands astride me. I can see up her skirt to her pantie covered crotch. She sneers down at me, "Yes, thats right, you're MY bitch tonight." (I nod dumbly) "Fucking SAY IT" she screams. "Yes, I am your bitch." "You are a filthy cunting sex whore." "Yes, oh,,, ohh please..." "FUCKING SAY IT" "Yes, I am your filthy cunting sex whore." Sarah smiles, then I feel it. The splatter of her piss against my face. I open my mouth widely and take it in. Her pee smells and tasted purely of her cunt. When she finishes, she squats beside me and yanks my panties to one side. My already spread legs yearn for what must surely now happen. I feel two of her fingers tantalizingly close, barely touching my pussly lips, barely grazing my clit ring. I can feel my pussy juices literally pouring from me. Then, into the screaming stillness of unfulfilled anticipation, she rams her fingers inside me. It is hard, fast, brutal. Seh finds my g spot on the first push and it is like being raped. My orgasm is total and oblivionises reality into a total whole body experience. With the heightened perception that comes only with total fulfillment, the night cascades into a million shards of colour. When I come to, (it would appear some 40 minutes later!) Sarah is in the hot tub. She has two chilled glasses of wine on the side and becons me towards her. every few steps she tells me to stop and take one item of clothing off. As I shed each item, something deep within me senses the change in Sarah. More than that, I sense that this is in some way, a ritual between us. I am shedding an old skin, item by item. Finally, I am naked and I climb the steps into the hot tub. Sarah stands to help me in. Then, she smiles that lovely smile of hers and says "Chrissy, do you trust me?" "Of course." "Do you love me?" (The question seems as natural as day and night. The answer, equally clearly is... "Yes. Yes I do." She takes my face in her hands and we both sink to our knees in the warm bubbly water. She kisses me deeply and I feel her urging me under the water. It is like the perfect baptism of love. We both emerge wet, and I know something has happened between us. Sarah tells me that she loves me and has done since the first time we met. She tells me of her pain for me when Allen died. Then, she tells me that she wants to stay with me. I hold her to me and we kiss. Not passionately this time. With no lust, no savagery no demand. We just kiss. Even as we do, I realise that we are both crying. We hold each other and then we sink into the water and we make love. Tenderly, impossibly tenderly. Each movment minimal in the extreem, but each reaction the perfect communion of giving. It is now 14:30 to following afternoon. Sarah and I have spent the morning moving her things into my house. It would seem I am in love.