A Need Filled

I know I have some sexual perversions. I think in my past I opened up to two men about all of my desires. One was the guy in my stories you may have read. I found his collection of home made porn and jilled off to each video and loved them. They actually made me love him more. To know he was such a sexual being -- very hot.

Anyway the man I am dating now has so many good qualities. SO MANY that I am trying to overlook his lack of sexual desire. When we do have sex, I literally have cum more and harder on his average size dick than any before in my life. Maybe it is because I am so needy of cumming when he finally gives it to me or maybe it is because I am now over 40 and don't give a shit about a lot of the hype of sex I used to.. now I just let go and FEEL. In any case - his lack of fucking me has caused me to take measures in my own hands (literally) and to use an ex for a "fuck and run" a couple times.

Yes, I feel guilty on one level -- but I NEED to get fucked and if my man won't even talk about it (he says he feels like that is all I think about at times) then I am getting it somewhere else.. I am sure if you are reading this you understand. I NEED to feel a hard cock pumping in me.

When he and I are fucking my thoughts are of him asking me how many more dicks I want. Of him telling me I am a good whore and need to fuck someone he has picked out. I think of him telling me it is a business transaction and I can be blindfolded and never kiss the man or men who will do me. He ties me to the bed and eats me while I am blindfolded. I am high as a kite and lost in the feeling on my pussy.. then he stops and a cock replaces it. Pushing in.. I am so wet. I hear the man fucking me breathe deep and moan. He talks to my man and tells him how tight and hot my pussy is.. I lift my hips and fuck back. I want him to call me a good whore.. I want to cum on his dick.. My man tells me to cum.. .. honestly that is what I really needed to hear and I let go. My pussy clenches violently, I feel like I have to pee.. I have learned when I have that feeling I let go and let whatever wants to pour out of me come.. it makes my orgasms amazing. I never pee but I do gush.. This man pulls out and cums on my tits.. My man asks me to take another. I want him in between though. I tell him and he goes down on me again. I hear him moaning while he eats me.. he licks the cum off my nipples and I ask him to fuck me. He says he is getting a great blow job from the man who just fucked me. OMG.... I cum. I need another cock... And another man is fucking me. He is hung like a horse.. I am cumming... "fuck me please... give me another dick" My bf rolls me on my knees as the man is now under me.. my bf shoves his dick in my wet ass -- its covered in my juice... He cums in two strokes as I tell him how good the cock in my pussy feels... the horse cock cums in me... I cum again... finally content for the moment.

That is generally the scenario I have running through my head while I mount my BF. I cum over and over thinking of this.. I want it but will always have to have a secret life in my head, online or even in reality to get my needs fulfilled... I hate that.