Every now and then, I get the urge to return to anal masturbation. Either with deliberate planning or spontaneously, I go looking for a penis-shaped toy, the sight of which makes me feel warm with anticipation. (Usually I keep it at home for only a few weeks or months and then discard it. The last time I did so, I swore I would not go there again. Story of my life.)
In the last few months, I have gone a couple of times into the adult toy store to look at the fake dicks. Today, with absolutely no forethought, I veered into the parking lot, went inside, compared different models and chose a 7 1/2' 'slim' one. There were others that I would have preferred for a more realistic shape, but they were either too short or too thick. I wanted one that goes in deep enough to feel it pressing inside me, without being too much of a ... stretch.
Brought it home wondering when I would get to use it. Turns out, I was going to be home alone for awhile. I carefully washed it, then went to the other bathroom and looked for the Vaseline (the very thought of which brings erotic feelings that trace back to teenage years), pulled my undies down and smeared some between my buns and over my asshole while thinking about how that means I am going to get fucked. Went to the guest room that I like for masturbation and undressed myself.
The dildo has a suction cup and I stuck it to the full-length mirror at just the right height for when I bend over. I wanted to have a good hard-on before I put it in me, so I got the lube and started stroking in front of the mirror, feeling the erection build up in my hand. I like to stand sideways so that I can see my bare ass and my hard dick. Usually my fantasies are about masturbation experiences or about sex with a female, but in extra-horny moods I fantasize about a situation where I am about to have my ass fucked. I carry on an entire lead-up conversation with the unknown male, both of us beating off and knowing what is going to happen. I did that today as I beat off and felt the sexy, erotic feelings, knowing I was soon going to do it to myself.
After masturbating for awhile, I turned facing away from the mirror, bent over, and guided the tip of it between my buns until I felt it touch my hole, then paused and anticipated the sensation of it going in.
It doesn't feel so good at first. I have to take my time, going in a little and then giving it a rest; sometimes taking it all the way out for a moment. Then back in. A couple of times, I stopped to beat off for awhile and re-fantasize, carrying on that conversation about what we're doing or about to do.
When I finally had it all way in and savored the feeling of it pushing against the insides of me, I straightened up with it still in me and beat off some more. I tend to lose the hard-on when my ass is being filled and sometimes it doesn't lead to orgasm. So, it's a trade-off. A once-in-a-while thing.
I didn't come but it felt good to have my ass fucked after a long time and to indulge those bi-sexual fantasies. If I am in the mood the next time I am alone, I will surely try again.