My only Regret!

My only regret is that I didn’t start masturbating sooner! If I could go back in time and change one thing I would start masturbating as young as possible. I would also experiment more with other men and women. When I was around six or seven my earliest experiences were with other boys. We would show each other our cocks, no touching. My parents caught me a few times. Being the conservative parents they were, they got a little angry. It didn’t really stop me, though! As I got older my Dad gave me a book to read. It was the kind of thing young teenagers read that’s supposed to help get them through puberty. It mentioned masturbation, but I had never done it before. I was scared. I was afraid other people would find out and I would be ostracized by my friends. I was about 14. I would toss and turn in bed, never getting to sleep. I would stroke a few times, but never to completion. One day in the middle of the night I went into the bathroom. I stood in the bathtub and was stroking. And then it happened. I came! It felt great! I decided that I was officially a dirty little masturbator, so I might as well go all the way. I jerked off every day. On weekends I would take a bath and jerk off while I soaked. I had a certain towel I would jerk off into at night. I would periodically hand wash it and hang it up to dry. In retrospect, it was probably pretty obvious to my parents what was going on, but they didn’t say anything. Fast forward to college. I was a really late bloomer with girls. I was still a virgin in college. I dated, and fooled around, but that was it. At some point in college it started to happen. I started to look up gay porn! I didn’t know what was going on. This is when I discovered the masturbation home page. It was my favorite site! I loved all of the stories, especially the ones with multiple guys. I still looked up straight porn, but I had these bi-curious phases that would come and go. They still do. I thought of meeting a guy online but I was scared. I was (and still am) mainly concerned with diseases. It’s what keeps me from fulfilling my crazy orgy fantasies. I would buy butt plugs and then get rid of them, afraid someone would find them. I jerked off all the time. I mainly thought of girls, but occasionally I imagined sucking off a guy, or taking it up the ass. A year or two after college I was living alone in Chicago. The bi cravings started to resurface. I shaved my balls for the first time. It felt great, but I don’t like the look of no hair. Since then I have settled on shaving my nuts but leaving hair above my cock. At a glance it looks normal, but it feels great. Manscaping at its best! Anyways, I finally met a guy online. I went over to his place. We sat down next to each other on the couch and whipped it out. I was so nervous! I could barely get hard. I touched and stroked his cock while he did the same to me. I didn’t like it. It took forever for me to get off. The only thing I liked about it was holding his cock. I wanted to suck it, but was scared. The other thing was that he was very gay acting. I realize now I prefer str8 acting guys, like myself. After that experience I decided I was “definitely” str8. I would have occasional cravings, but I would just look up some gay porn and jerk off, nothing else. I also had several girlfriends. While I was with a girlfriend I had almost no bi cravings. I guess I strongly prefer women, but when I’m not getting any, I get creative. Anyone will do! Last year I was 29. I followed through. I needed new underwear. I’m a boxers kind of guy and briefs don’t do it for me, but I thought I would try boxer briefs. I put them on and they felt great! I couldn’t keep my hands off myself. There was something really sensual about them, smooth and fitted. That whole day went down the tubes. I took my whole to-do list and tossed it out the window. I spent the whole day online looking up porn. I looked up gay porn, str8 porn, bi porn, everything. At this point I was single, although I had a one night stand with a girl a few weeks earlier. The gay side came back in full force! I met a guy online. We met at a bar and had a few drinks (and then a few more). He was gay, and really liked me. I was “experimenting.” We went back to his place all drunk. I asked him if he had any porn. He had some, but he didn’t like it. I begged him to put it in. He finally did. He gingerly asked if we could watch it with our pants off. That’s why I’m here, right? We took off our pants, him in his briefs and me in my boxer briefs. The details are blurry, but we went off. I stroked him, he stroked me, I sucked him (finally!) he sucked me. 69, grinding, rimming (which I didn’t do to him, he did to me, after all, shit carries disease!) He wanted to kiss, but I’m not into that either. Having his cock in my mouth was quite an experience! In the end we lubed up and both came all over my chest. I went to the bathroom to clean up. When I came back he was wearing my underwear! I wasn’t into that either. I got my stuff and left. I went home, drunk, and jerked off. I woke up the next morning and jerked off AGAIN! He and I still keep in touch, although I don’t think it will happen again. I’m still afraid of diseases. I’m so tired of labels. Straight, gay, bi, who cares? I know a lot of vegetarians who eat the occasional big mac. I guess that’s me. I’m straight, but sometimes I go gay. What difference does it make? I want a woman who is as sexually open as I am. I also want a suck buddy, a guy like me who is straight, but likes to mess around occasionally. Then I can swallow some cum, which is next on my sexual to-do list along with sex with two girls and sex with two (or three or four or twelve) guys, and an orgy. In the end I love sex. Pussies, cocks (especially mine), I love it all!