My Sexual Misery...and Relief
I'm an above-average guy in both looks and intelligence. In 1973, in my mid-twenties, I had a nervous breakdown. I was eventually diagnosed as a major depressive in 1974; and there were no useful long-term anti-depressants for me at the time. I should say there were a couple in the MAOI category, but no doctor was willing to mention it at the time...much less prescribe it. Supposedly, the MAOIs had dangerous ramifications when mixed with certain foods.
And so, after a short period of hospitalization, my wife and I decided to split, with her taking my son to California along with a new gynecologist husband. My son was four at the time. Now he's 30, married, and just made me a grandfather. His disdain for me has taken a toll, as he also had a bout with depression through his teens, and medicates for it up to now.
To get to the nitty-gritty, I began to take Nardil, one of those 'dangerous' but powerful anti-depressants called MAOIs, in 1987, fifteen years after the onset of my misery.
Now, it's nearly seventeen years on this drug, and for this time period I have been anorgasmic, and partially impotent.
The story has gotten around, and today it's hard to find a date among the people that I know...and those I don't know, after confessing the truth.
Now it has gotten down to a physical need. Seventeen years without an orgasm can make one sexually fanatical. So I bought a thousand dollar machine called the 'Venus' with the hope that it would serve me in a way that defies my shortcoming, and allow me an orgasm.
It turns out that my first orgasm in 17 years was with the help of that machine. It only took me about twelve hours of work and experimentation to gain my so-long sought after release. It's essentially a motorized pump, a rubberized tube, and a speed that can far surpass the hand, and with great comfort. It is electrical.
Approximately every three months it seems I get horny enough to use the machine, along with a small ass invader to massage my prostate. I need mental stimulation in the way of a porn flick, and Viagra, and pillows, and a lot of lubrication, to do the trick. It works about one out of ten times. The rest is just a sensual massage....quite pleasant.
For tomorrow night, I have arranged for two young ladies to aid and abet my machine wanking. It is with great hope and ideas that I look forward to this date. Both of these young ladies are bi-sexual, and both know about my problem, and the fact that I also have a very expensive machine to provoke their own multiple orgasms...the Sybian. Both are veterans of the Sybian and love it. The machine for them stimulates both the clitoris and the g-spot at the same time as they control the speed, inside and out. Neither had gushed before using the Sybian, but now their orgasms are so strong that they are forever gushing on this machine.
My plan is to put one machine next to the other, and while one lady is pursuing her own rush on the Sybian, the other lady will use a strap-on for my prostate massage as I watch the goings-on on the Sybian...right next to me. With my Venus, and a dildo up my ass, I should be able to approach my climax, if not fulfill it.
I fully intend on watching the two of them relieve themselves together, but only after success on the Sybian. Still, skin on skin is a most appealing erotic feeling above and beyond these powerful machines. I hope to mix the two. Last week one of the ladies went to her knees and, while she gave me oral, used a finger to massage my prostate, me standing. It blew my mind, but not my load.
It seems that the large majority of women do not recognize that the prostate gland in a man is a most exquisitely sensitive sexual gland. When a woman is having straight sex with a man, she should use a finger to probe the prostate. In that way, she controls the timing of the male's orgasm to synchronize with her own. She actually feels the male's member expand within her as she probes. In the finality of tomorrow, this pleasure lies ahead of me.
Wish me luck.