Beat Up, Beat Off

When I was about 14 years old there was this kid that I knew, his name was Josh.

He was very even-tempered and somewhat quiet. Josh had black hair and tanned skin, his eyes were green. He was a swimmer and had a swimmer's body. I admired Josh because he was smart and he had the looks that I didn't have. I began struggling with acne in middle school, Josh had smooth baby skin.

I used to harass this guy constantly and it wasn't because I didn't like him, I admired him. It was just that nothing seemed to phase him and I wanted to see him get angry for once. I literally day dreamed about what Josh would be like when he was angry. I'd get him frustrated sometimes, but he'd always manage to pull himself back in and calm down.

One day I kept going at him, physically nudging and pushing him every chance I got. Then he just turned around and hit me in the shoulder and he pushed me back and hit me again. Before I had a chance to respond he got me in the gut and before I knew it we were on the floor and he had the better of me. He was genuinely upset and he was definitely hurting me. Until students and teachers could break it up, I could feel the rage of an entire school year of me picking on him coming back on me.

While Josh was beating the crap out of me, it was strange because I couldn't be happier. He had me down on the floor and I had the hardest hard on I ever had in my life. I honestly went home and jacked off still sore from being punched and kicked, but turned on by this sudden outburst.

Since Josh had been the aggressor and had the upper hand he was almost expelled, while I was about to get the lesser punishment. I told the administrators everything that I had done and that I had brought the fight upon myself, I just didn't tell them exactly why. Josh was able to stay in school without being punished.

Later he kept trying to apologize to me, but I told him that it was OK.

I laid off of Josh but, I always dreamed about him turning on me again.