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My Beginning

My story may seem strange to many people here because it happened about 60 years ago and in a very different place. I grew up in Ireland as an only child. Sex was never spoken of while I was young. Of course I experienced the normal stirrings, desires and anxieties that any young man does but nothing was explained. I was almost 20 before I read a book which made sense of all I had felt and observed growing up.

The incident I describe happened soon after my 12th birthday. An old uncle of my mother's who lived alone was very ill. My mother brought me along with her to visit him. There were other relatives there but the only person of my age was a girl cousin about 2 years older and I didn't really know her. I was fairly timid and stayed close to my mother. During the visit I realised that I needed to pee and I tried to hold it until we left. However at a certain stage I knew that I had to go so I managed to whisper to my mother. She called my cousin and said Peggy will show you where to go. I was mortified but had no choice.

I followed Peggy into the yard and she brought me to an outhouse where there was a toilet and washbasin. She opened the door for me and said its in there. I went in and turned to close the door but Peggy was behind me and obviously coming in as well. Go on she said I'll close the door so that nobody can come in. I felt very uncomfortable because the only female to have seen me pee was my mother. I was uncomfortable too because I had that dull ache down there that can only be relieved by peeing. I went to the toilet and my back was to Peggy. I heard her bolt the door. I pulled out my penis but my pee was slow in coming. I could hear Peggy behind me. She went to the washbasin and turned the tap and as the water flowed so did my pee. I had quite a bit as I had been holding it for quite a while. As I peed I was aware of Peggy looking at my penis and my pee as it splashed into the toilet. When I finished Peggy said you must have been bursting! Then she told me to wash my hands. As I did this I was horrified to notice that Peggy had pulled down her pants and was peeing herself. You can look if you want to, she said, I'm used to my brothers looking. I don't know if I said anything but I turned away as I washed my hands. Why? Too shy I suppose. It might have been different a couple of years later. I only turned towards her when I thought she was finished and I got a glimpse of white pants with pink trim disappearing under her tartan skirt. We went back to the company then and I had very little contact with Peggy after that.

Now nothing took place apart from what I described but a couple of months later I had my first wet dream and I woke up to the stickiness feeling hot and flushed with the image of Peggy pulling up her pants in my mind. I discovered masturbation with my hand a few weeks later and that same image was my fantasy for a while. So it would seem that this situation made an impression on my subconscious. Later I began to think of different girls and different situations. We all start in different ways and although nothing happened between us, for me Peggy was the beginning of my masturbation.


Posted on: 2006-10-24 00:00:00 | Author: