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Ever Present Hands, and Now Have Quit

Hi, Just a note to say that if you think you can't quit masturbating, you can. When I was born, I was holding and rubbing my penis, even as I left my mother's womb. (I don't personally remember that, but I am told that that was how it was). Anyways, whenever I would get a diaper change or had an opportunity at that age, my hand gravitated to my penis. Nobody was too concerned until after my diaper wearing months.

I was masturbating everywhere almost 24/7. If I was standing up or walking, I was holding or tugging. If I was sitting, I was wiggling my penis. If I was lying on my back I was rubbing, but my favourite was when I was lying on my stomach. I then rocked my penis over my fist, a pillow, the mattress or a stuffed animal.

Nothing my parents tried would make me stop. When I was four I finally got some control. My parents were able to teach me to play with myself only in my bedroom or the bathroom. This helped reduce how often I masturbated, but it was still very frequent and I still slipped up, playing with myself in public sometimes.

When I was in kindergarten, I often masturbated on the carpet in the classroom when the urges were strong, which bothered my teacher and other students. My parents stepped in and helped me to get this under control. I too wanted to have this under control. Each evening we would talk and I would tell my parents how many times I masturbated, where I was and when for that day. I would feel good if it was only a couple times, with little amount of time spent doing it.

After a hard struggle, I was only masturbating when I woke up each morning. I was still doing it daily during my elementary years, but significantly less than before. Then I hit junior high. I got frequent erections, started ejaculating and got strong urges again. I never masturbated in public anymore but would spend countless hours in public restrooms masturbating if I wasn't at home and had strong urges I began taking longer showers too.

Once again I needed my parents to help me be accountable and bring this into control. It wasn't until I was 18 that I decided I would never masturbate again. It was extremely difficult, seeing as I discovered it when I was real young! I kept regressing all the time, but kept looking forward not back. Each time, every attempt to quit got easier.

I now haven't masturbated for sixteen months, but I had to set the bar high to do that. I had to want to quit. Before, I was only concerned with keeping it in control. Of course, I couldn't quit with that being the standard. What helped me to keep it under control when I was little, was accountability with my parents.

The first thing was actually wanting to do it less and then having accountability. The next was setting the standard higher. So, if you have a hard time quitting, I know what you are going through. I am familiar with that urge, that tingly feeling in your penis that makes you want to touch and rub it. I know what it feels like.

However, one thing I am not familiar with are issues like pornography, lust or fantasizing. I never did any of that. I was masturbating mainly because I wanted to, as it felt good and probably because I was addicted to it.

My advice would be that if your urges to masturbate come from porn and fantasizing, it might be easier to quit if you can take care of those issues first. Then look at the masturbation issue, but I'm not sure that's the best approach in those circumstances, as I am unfamiliar with no experience there.

Wanting to stop and an accountability pattern will help you to stop if you wish to.


Posted on: 2004-09-24 00:00:00 | Author: