Jerking into My Mouth

I have been trying to suck my dick for years. I just can't get it into my mouth so the best I can do is lay on my back with my dick over my mouth and let it shoot down. The other alternative is to jerk off into my hand and lick it clean. I wish I could share this with my wife but she would think I am crazy.

She will jerk me off or give me a blow job but will not swallow my cum. I dream of cumming on her tits and licking them clean or cumming in my mouth as above, and then giving her my load with a kiss or eating her out after I cum in her.

Oh well-maybe some day.

Would like to read of others who swallow their own cum.