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The Basement and My Big Cousin

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I must have been about 10 and my cousin, James, was about 16. After his father died a few years before, he and his mom (my aunt) and sister moved from brooklyn to where i lived. We became close and he was like a big brother to me. I watched every sport he did and became a fan of every team he liked, even to today, 25 years later. Our grandparents had a house further out on the island that we used to go to with our families and visit. The ranch style house had an unfinished basement and we would go down there to play. It was not finished, just concrete. There, we would make up silly games, crawl into the crawl space and chat about stuff. My cousin had thought of a game. There was a pinic bench down in the basement, why i dont know. But my cousin suggested that We pretend that he was the patient and I was the doctor. I can remember this like it was yesterday, the position of the bench, the smell of concrete and dust, the cool feeling of a below ground cave. It started where he would say that his leg hurt and have me rub his leg, then he slowly got me to rub high, right where his crotch met his leg, then he pointed to the front of his shorts and he told me how to rub up and down on this fleshy feeling thing inside his shorts. To me, i didnt know what I was touching, just thought it part of his leg still. (it didnt dawn on me until my 20s what had happend). I can still see him lying there as my hand grew tired, his eyes closed and the one arm draped to the side, the back of his other hand on his forehead. My little fingers grew very tired and he urged me to continue and being anamored with my older cousin as a male role model, i continued until he began to tremble and let out soft moans and groans and eventually told me to stop. As I write this, im thinking he may have told me not to tell anyone about our game, but im not sure. That was the only time i recall ever doing anything with him again. But we still remained close for a number of years.

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