Technique from the Hardware Store

Posted by: Author: Age: 55 Posted on: 0 comments
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Try the hardware store! Like most middle-aged guys, I have a shop in the garage; and since I gave up any guilt about masturbating years ago, I decided to use my shop to make things that would help me masturbate, and also to provide more sex enjoyment for my wife and me. Guys, take trips to different stores with the specific goal of finding stuff to masturbate with.

Here are some of my successful ideas:

For simply sitting at the computer and masturbating to porn DVDs or the Internet, get a 2-foot piece of neoprene flex hose. I use the 1-1/2 inch diameter stuff. I slide my cock snugly inside and suck on the other end for a really great vacuuming blow job!

My best devices are artificial vaginas. I take pieces of sheet foam rubber and roll them into a sort of deep cone shape and hot glue the edges together. I have experimented with all sorts of shapes and sizes and types of rubber. Use the 'dense' kind. Get some spray latex coating and spray a VERY thin layer on the inside surface and you have a great masturbation device that feels incredibly like a pussy! For fun I even tried sculpting some with a dremel tool so that the opening looked like a vagina slit with labia and a clit and everything. I usually keep a spare one in the car for 'emergencies', too.

My wife ordered two 'body pillows' from a catalog. They turn out to make marvelous 'platforms' for humping on. They are about the same size and length as a woman's body and firm enough to feel like it. You can put them under you and embrace them or wrap your legs around them and really get a great fuck sensation between your thighs and against your body. We keep 'em in the bedroom and use them for sexual positions too, like elevating my wife's hips for deep entry. She also is always shopping for lotions and cosmetics to help us have sex and to masturbate.

Since I like anal sensations a lot, I shaped some small 3/4' and 1/2' dowels about 2' long with rounded ends for sliding into my butthole. They can go all the way in. That way my ass has something substantial to clench around when I masturbate. I can squirm down on the pillow or the corner of the mattress and make one really stimulate my butt if I want. This really improves the sensations for me. I also made one about 10' long that I can lube up and fuck in and out of my ass and pretend I'm getting ass-fucked.

I guess you guys all know about vibrating massagers from the drugstore or hardware store-the hand-held kind with all the attachments. The cup end attachment fits exactly over my dick head and is so intensely pleasurable that if I don't watch out it can make me come in ten seconds!!

Here is what I like to do. I like to take at least an hour or two alone like on a Saturday or Sunday afternoon and have a real masturbation-fest. I keep the idea of trying to make myself come two or three separate times at least. Usually I begin by unzipping, letting my dick hang out. I play with myself and get hard as I go through the house to get all my 'stuff' ready for my masturbating session. I choose a favorite porn dvd and put it in the player while I finger myself. Sometimes I'll just jack myself off really quick for the first time to get some relief. Then I'll get out my 'toys'. I put the big body pillow on the bed or maybe the living room couch. Then I get my KY out and slick up a foam rubber vagina. (right now the one I am trying out has velcro tabs so I can make the pussy tight or sloppy-loose.) I plug in my vibrator. I strip naked and crawl onto the big pillow. Sometimes I'm just in a hurry for a cum, so I'll just put KY in my hand and grind and hump on the pillow as I watch the porn flicks and fuck down into my fist.

Then I am free to lie back and enjoy milking out my cum (I love looking down at my dick oozing it) and then trying to make myself hard again. I'll roll over or sit up and use the vibrator by running it all around my crotch and inside my thighs. Then I slide it up and down my cock shaft until I start getting hard again. I can put in one of my wooden 'butt plugs' and if I touch the end of it with the vibrator, I can really get a *wonderful* sensation! Oh, I forgot to say that at the hardware store you can find these little clamps with adjustable tension that you can put on your nipples to arouse them and improve your errogenous feelings there!

Anyway, then I am ready for a long luxurious self-fuck where I hump the body pillow and fuck into the artificial vagina, stimulate my ass, and do anything else I can think of to get off. I try to 'edge' and go slowly and then build up until I can't stand it and have to come into the pussy. If I'm lucky this takes almost an hour of masturbating myself with my toys before I finally orgasm. After that I am sometimes 'greedy' and just lean back against the headboard and put the foam pussy back on my cock and then use the vibrator on it just to see how many times I can make myself come. I often just use the vibrator right on my shaft. I *love* the 'sizzling' sound it makes when my cum drips onto the attachment during an orgasm. Real sexy!

I don't forget my wife either. I made some dowel dildos for her, and coated them with the same latex spray. I custom made them in just the sizes and thicknesses she asked for (right now her fave is a little 6-inch 'shorty' that is not very thick but has a nice hand grip on it. She keeps it in her night stand.) It was real fun watching her 'do' herself with them to try them out! I think she has 'loaned' a couple of them to her friends, too. I may try making her some more with a coating of that plastic they dip tool handles into.

Sorry this got so long. Just remember to do yourself a favor and make some trips to the hardware store with masturbation on your mind. Enjoy!



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