Teaching him to let go

Sex, Masturbation... He had always enjoyed both of these.  On our second date we had sex. I hadn't been touched in months and I was craving closeness, passion and touch. That first night was surreal.   I thought I had finally met my sexual match, someone who was not inhibited and did not have hangups about sexual issues. That was only partially true.  We did not part after that night and quickly moved in together. It started to become clear that we did not share the same turn ons.  One evening while we were enjoying our nightly love making I thought I would try something new. While he was in the shower, I made a video of myself rubbing my pussy. Sprawled out on the bed, my head on a pillow and knees pulled up and legs spread, I rubbed and enjoyed my hot wet hole for the camera. I was so excited to share this with him, thinking it would quickly lead to another session of fun. "I made something for you" I declared coyly, heart beating rapidly.   I waited in anticipation while I turned on the TV and plugged in the video camera. The video started, there I was on screen rubbing, moaning, girating for him. Looking at him for his reaction  I was crushed.   He was looking at his phone and just sitting on the bed appearing as if he wasn't interested at all.   "Hey, are you watching this?" I asked feeling a surge of embarrassment and disappointment.  "That just doesn't do anything for me" he stated matter of factly.  Suddenly, I wanted to cry. I knew from past experience with him that we always did the same thing every time.  Straight sex, nothing else.   One other time I had asked him to make love to me and he had laughed and declared that the terminology "making love" was stupid.   People just fucked.   For many years I held onto these experiences and pushed them deep down.     After  all this guy wanted sex every night unlike my last relationship where six months would go by with no activity at all  . Why was I being so petty? By our seventh year together I had finally reached my breaking point. Missionary position sex had lost its appeal and I had started to think that I didn't even need to be in the room while we were doing it.   He would probably fuck a hole in a tree.   It was all about him getting off.   At one time I had explained to him that sex should be enjoyable by both man and woman.   He did try to finger me after he came, but I could tell by the way he held his hand out from his body in disgust that he was not enjoying it at all. My desires just didn't interest him and I was devastated and frustrated. Finally, I brought this issue up in a counseling session.  One of our homework assignments was to try pleasing each other.  I stated that I was ready to leave the marriage and that I could not live without feeling that my partner was turned on by me.   He swore he loved me and wanted to try.  I was very sure that this was a moot point and that we were just incompatible. During this time I had started to chat with people online who actually enjoyed watching and pleasing another. Especially men.  I was amazed, because I was totally convinced that men were self-centered and that they were only interested in their own pleasure.  Boy was I wrong!   Maybe I was just uneducated and lacking in experience. So I made a decision, my mission was to teach him about the importance of mutual satisfaction.  He seemed to be an eager student.

One night I was feeling a bit horny, so I started to rub myself through my sweatpants.   We were sitting on separate couches watching TV.   He was oblivious to what I was doing, so I pointed it out.   I spread my legs a little bit and turned my body to face him.  "Rub your cock for me" I pleaded. To my surprise he started to touch himself through his pajama pants. He was growing harder with every touch.  I ran my hand inside my pants and played with my clit for a minute.  His eyes were squinted and he was looking up at the ceiling.  "What are you thinking about"?  I asked.   "There was this girl who lived across the street from me when I was young, she was kind of big, but she wore these shorts and I could not stop looking at her legs" he continued.   " I wanted to fuck her so badly"   He wasn't thinking about me or watching me but this was a breakthrough.   I had gotten him to lay on the couch and touch himself and tell me about something that turned him on;  this was major.  

Just then he looked at me and gestured for me to come over to him. I did and he demanded, "take off your pants"   I liked this side of him.   It was a first indication that maybe he could change.   Well, I obliged and shed my pants and climbed on his lap and held his readied cock.   I slid myself down near it and started to stroke, up and down.  It felt incredible. He ran his hands up my shirt and caressed my tits and played with my nipples. I lifted his shirt up over his head and threw it on the floor. He pulled me in close and kissed me passionately.   It was so exciting doing it right there in the living room. We moved together in rhythm getting more and more excited with every second. I arched my back and threw my head back allowing him to fondle my breasts more easily.   Faster I stroked.   I could feel him pulsating inmy hand.    The intensity in his face was increasing and I could tell he was going to cum. I increased my pace and fondled his sack and he started to moan loudly and yell, "God you got me, Oh my God you got me!" Shots of his hot cream hitting me as he began to relax.   This was progress.   I felt so alive, so happy that he had allowed himself to enjoy something other than just sex in our bed.  Even if it was while thinking of the neighbor girl from his youth.   Maybe, just maybe I could get him to enjoy this wonderful world of eroticism.