Please excuse my bad english. I am not a native speaker.
To be continued with 'First Fantasies & Experiences'
Till the age of 12, I had no idea of arousal or sexual feelings at all.
In my sex education book that I had since being 10 there was mentioned, that if a couple wanted a baby, the man puts his penis in the vagina of the woman, moves it back and forth until the semen spurts out. This was called the orgasm of the man and it was mentioned that if the act would take long enough women could get an orgasm too. So since it never spoke about any fun concerned with the act this book clearly did not encourage me to any personal investigations. It mentioned some practices for contraception but I never got the point: If a couple didnt want a baby, why do this?
Since I was younger, from time to time when I awoke at night, I could hear the bed of my parents moving and shreiking, but I never cared about it and simply went back to sleep (there was only a wall between their sleeping room an my room).
This special night-again waking up and hearing the sounds from my parents bed-I for the first time associated that this must be the thing described in my book-my parents wanted a baby! But my logic told me that I have heard these sounds for years without ever seeing a new baby. This night I paid more attention to the sounds and I could not only hear the bed but also my father and mother. And it sounded not like a technical thing but it sounded like fun!
This was the first time I put a finger inside me just to try how a penis could feel like. This wasn´t fun but exploring myself more I got wet and then found out that the whole area 'down there' was very sensible.
Seconds after that I found my clit and this was the best discovery I ever made! Teasing it with my fingers brought sooo much fun and the feelings got the more and more intense! Finally I exploded with delight and from this second on I knew what the word 'orgasm' in my sex education book really ment. Minutes after calming down I tried it again and-boom-even more intense! This night I went to sleep very happy: I had discovered the best feeling in the world, and I could get it all by myself without any help, whenever I wanted!!
Needless to say, that I really had found a new hobby and could not wait bedtime coming! I went to the library and found sex education books for youngsters 14-16 and found out that my new evening-hobby was called masturbation.
And I did it every, every, every night before sleeping-without sexual fantasies, just enjoing the feelings my body was able to.
See you back in my next story 3 years later...