So I need some advice on how to return a pair of panties. I didn't buy them. I did laundry, and the neighbor girl's panties got mixed in with my load. Well, not that load. Not yet. No, I did the load about 5 days ago, brought it up without folding it because I'm lazy, and just now noticed. So now it looks like I've kept her panties for a week and she'll think I kept them that long to masturbate in them or something.
Actually, I'll tell you a story. It's a good one. It's from my junior year in college. I had moved into this apartment, it was one of four in an old building. My roommate and I were in one of the upstairs units. Anyway, each unit had basement space sort of partitioned off, and everyone had a washer and dryer. But the landlady told us that the other upstairs unit didn't have one, or it was broken or needed to be replaced, and so they'd be using ours. We said fine, no problem.
Well, the other upstairs tenants were these two hot chicks - I mean intimidating hot. I was a shy guy most of college and didn't really have the confidence to hit on women, and my roommate sort of the same way, so we both sort of admired them from afar. We were certain one or both of them had to be a stripper up at the Dollhouse, based on the collection of panties we saw in the laundry. Red tiger print, zebra print, paisley, lace crotch, purple satin with black lace fringe, thongs, g-strings, crotchless. We were amazed. Then one day we saw them sunbathing out back - Oh my Lord, what bodies. At that point I knew they were way out of my league.
The apartment had a back exit, and that was the same door you used to go down the stairs into our section of the basement. So one day I was leaving for class and I noticed a pair of white satin panties left on the bottom step just inside the door, like they'd been dropped there. I picked them up and took them back to my room. Now, of course, there were two, maybe three options here. One, leave them with her laundry. Two, return them in person and use it as an entre into hitting on her. Or three, masturbate with them. Guess what I chose.
Fast forward, I guess about a month or so. My roommate and another fraternity brother are over and we're getting drunk and stupid midweek, when we were supposed to be studying. I went downstairs to get my laundry out of the dryer, and it was already folded, in my basket, and the girl with the amazing panties had her load in the dryer. I took my laundry upstairs and told Scott the panties were back, and we told Al about it, come on down and check this out. Al was laughing like a teenager and we were all taking our turns clowning around with the panties. Al started sniffing the red paisley ones, and I told him to knock it off - I didn't tell him, but it's because I'd jerked off with them a couple times. I started folding the girl's laundry, deliberately folding the panties too. Then Al got an idea.
He says, 'I'll give you a case of beer if you sit down here for an hour with a pair of panties on your head.' At first I thought, no way, but with enough of a buzz going, I finally decided what the fuck. It could be an icebreaker. I could also get slapped, but it's not like I was going to get any from this girl anyway, right? So I went upstairs, got a few beers to last me the hour, sat down on a chair and put the panties on my head. Al and Scott went back upstairs to play video games, saying they'd check in on me every 15 minutes. They didn't want to be down there if the girl came back, and take any heat for this prank, so most of this was on my honor.
20 minutes in the door opens and no one says anything, and I say, 'Scott? Al?' and I hear the girl say, 'No...?' I gotta tell you, I was totally frightened. I had panties on my head and she was going to catch me and God knows what trouble I would be in, either with her, or the landlady or a tough boyfriend or what. Through a leghole I saw her, she was in a white t-shirt and sweatpants, with her stringy black hair up in a ponytail. Still hot as hell. So I just decided to bull ahead with the truth, this was a bet, ha ha, want a beer?
She goes, 'Uh, what are you doing?' And I whip the panties off my head and toss them to her and start explaining - bet, stupid frat guys, I was gonna win a case of beer, ha ha ha, want a beer? She doesn't say anything for, like, the longest moment of my life while I am sitting there with a stupid grin and a red face. Then she takes a beer and says, 'I'm glad you find my panties so amusing. I fold your fucking laundry and you probably jack off with mine.'
So at this point I am starting my escape, and she tells me to sit down. 'No, sit down. You're in trouble, now you have to listen to me and just sit there and take it. Sit down.' I'm apologizing like crazy and she tells me to shut up or she'll bring the landlady in and then I'll be in real trouble. 'And I know you jack off with my panties,' she said. She had no proof but the accusation froze me.
'I left that pair on your back step so you'd come talk to me you asshole,' she said. 'But I didn't get them back for two weeks, and you just left them in the basket, so I think I know what's going on.'
At this point the door opens, it's Al checking on me. 'Go away!' she said, and Al goes, 'Alright bye!' and slammed the door. I heard him run up the stairs. So then she tells me she wants me to tell her which ones I've stroked with, so she can throw them out. We go through the whole pile. White satin, yes. Yes how many times, lots? Yes, lots. OK, next one, tiger print. Yes, lots. Did you cum on them? I did, but I washed them immediately. Well, thanks. Next one, did you cum on these too? No, but I did jack off with them. OK, I won't ask what you did. What about these, down the line. Finally I blurted out, 'Are you a stripper? I mean, you have all these wild panties.' She told me that was none of my goddamn business, but I was free to fantasize.
Pretty much the only panties left were the plain white cotton panties. 'Alright, well, you owe me a lot of money for these,' she said. 'I should make you guy buy them, but you'd probably just take them and jack off into them.' I had zero cash. I didn't get paid by the college paper until three weeks, and had been putting everything on my credit card. I told her all I had was plastic, and very little cash. Certainly not enough to cover about 20 pair of new panties.
'God dammit,' she said. 'I'm gonna have to wear these, aren't I, after they've been around your dick.'
I apologized profusely again, but I really had nothing left to say or offer. I pleaded with her not to complain to the landlady. She told me I was a fucking asshole and had no idea how violated she felt. I said, 'I know how you feel.'
'No, you don't,' she said. Then she got an idea. 'You want to jack off in my panties, go ahead. Show me what you do. I'm going to watch.' I'm like, 'You gotta be kidding,' and she says, no, and tells me to take off my shorts. I refuse and she tells me she's going to go to the land lady. At this point I stand up to leave, and she grabs the sides of my gym trunks and says, 'Take your goddamn pants OFF!' and yanks them to the floor.
Now I'm standing there with my dick out and my balls dangling, and this smoking hot girl has just ripped my pants off, and even though I'm frightened, I start to get a little hard. So I sit down, and she throws the purple ones with a black lace crotch at me. I lean back and start masturbating with them. She's watching me and making a point of drinking her beer casually.
'God, don't you moan or move or anything?' she says. I tell her I try to keep quiet because I have a roommate. 'Well, you're going to fucking moan for me, and I want other people to hear it.' So I start moaning, Ohhhh, baby, yeah, mmmm, making me so hard .... Want to fuck you .... Etc. It's really contrived. Then she says, 'Moan my name.' I tell her I don't even know her name. She says it's Lori, and she tells me to start rolling my hips and moving my ass when I jack off.
Now I am completely turned on. I'd never jacked off for a girl before - I was 20 at the time - but this completely tore down my barriers. So I am rolling, grinding, moaning, talking dirty and then she leans against the washing machine, rolls her sweatpants - no panties - down to her ankles, and starts masturbating. God that was so hot, I'd never seen a girl masturbate before. I get up and walk over to her and she puts one hand around my butt and pulls me into her, as I'm still jacking off in the panties, and then she takes her fingers from her pussy and puts them in my mouth and asks me if I want to fuck her, and right there I cum, on her stomach and her panties and her pubic hair.
God it was so hot. I've never done anything like that since then. So clearly, you see what I'm hoping for with this latest pair.