What I do is probably so wrong but it helps me and I know it helps my son.
I'm a 39 year old divorced mother. I've been divorced for eight years. My son is 19 and I got custody of him when his father left us. I have to admit, I have a decent body but I'm not very pretty, and finding a love interest has been difficult. I get so horny being lonely and other than masturbation I have no way to take care of those feelings.
I started noticing my son developing into a man when he was about 16. He is tall and handsome and he works out and has a wonderful 19 year old body. You know how young boys are, I never saw him without clothes after he was about 10 years old. As he grew up I knew he had started masturbating because he would sometimes forget to dispose of the 'used' tissues and leave them on his bed or on the floor beside his bed.
Little did he know that his mom was busy masturbating at night when she went to bed. I masturbate like crazy and just wish some man would come into my life and fuck me hard every night. I miss that so much. In a strange and possibly kinky way, finding my son's soiled tissues started turning me on. I knew I would never go to bed with my son; that would be horribly wrong and probably illegal. But knowing he was jacking off down the hall from me almost became an obsession and it was driving me crazy.
I decided one day to do something extremely daring, hoping it wouldn't upset my son, but also hoping we might find a way to openly discuss masturbation ... and see what happens. I didn't want to walk in on my son as he was masturbating because I didn't want to upset him and embarrass him. I decided the best thing to do was to let him catch me naked in the midst of masturbating.
My son comes home from his freshman year of college classes every day about 4 in the afternoon. We have a small apartment and when one opens the front door and comes in you are right there in the living room. I stripped naked and laid on the couch, so nervous I can't even describe it. I spread my legs apart and began rubbing my clit and fingering my pussy, and massaging my nipples with my other hand. My heart was beating wildly. I was so afraid yet so excited at the same time.
I practiced laying there with my eyes closed, just like I wanted him to find me, like I didn't even see him come in. The hour was approaching. I was having frantic thoughts of quickly dressing. Surely I couldn't do this. I heard his car door shut and knew he would be opening the door any second and I closed my eyes and literally held my breath.
The door opened and my son stepped into the room. 'Excuse ME!' he shouted. He just stood there looking at me. I knew he hadn't seen me naked since he was a young boy. I said 'Oh my gosh, I'm sorry!' I had left my clothes in the bedroom though and had nothing to cover up with. I told him I hoped it didn't shock him too much. I said 'look, I'm lonely and I do this now and then ... JUST LIKE YOU DO.' He kept staring at my breasts and pussy and then my face, then back to my tits and pussy.
I apologized again for him seeing me in this state. He said, 'gee Mom, that's OK.' My son then said, 'but I don't do that ...' and I immediately said 'You jack that thing off every chance you get. I know it.' and I smiled at him. I was suddenly feeling extraordinarily sexy letting my grown up son see me like this. I patted the couch and said 'come on over and let's talk.' I made no attempt to find anything to cover up with. He came over and sat beside me. I could see he couldn't take his eyes off my body. I said 'let's face it. Masturbation is a natural thing. We all do it. Many of us, like myself, need it. I like it. It helps me through the years of lonliness.' I asked him how often he did it and he sheepishly admitted probably every day. I smiled and said 'that's OK.'
I asked him what he thought about when he masturbated and he said he thought of certain girls he knew and he fantasized about what they looked like naked. I asked him, 'well, what do you think of me naked?' He said 'I think you look sexy, Mom.' I said 'I know I'm not pretty but I do think I have a nice body.' He agreed again that my body looked very nice.
I saw a lump in his pants and I knew he was getting hard looking at me. I said, 'John, would you like to really look at me?' He said he sure would. I said 'then why don't I just go back to what I was doing and you can watch all you want!' He looked at me almost in a stunned way. I moved him back towards the end of the couch and I spread my legs very wide so he could easily see every square inch of my pussy and I resumed rubbing my clit and fingering my pussy.
I saw him as he cupped his hard-on through his pants and squeeze himself. I said, 'John, do you have a hard-on?' He said yes showing a little embarrassment. I told him to feel free to take it out of his pants and masturbate with me if he wanted to. That was all I needed to say!
He stood up and removed his pants and underwear. My son had a really nice hard 6 to 7 inch dick standing straight up in the air. He gripped it and started slowly jacking himself as he watched me. I have to admit that seeing my son's big hard dick thrilled me. I hadn't seen a man's hard dick in years and I was loving it. I couldn't help admiring his pubic hair and his balls. My son was all grown up!
As he jacked himself faster and harder he started telling me how much this was turning him on, how sexy my hairy pussy looked (I am really covered in thick dark hair down there) and how nice my tits looked. It only took him about two minutes and he said, 'Mom, I'm gonna cum!.' He wasn't prepared as usual with tissues so I told him to squirt on my tummy. Boy did he unload on me. It was thrilling to see him squirting so much cum and watch his facial expressions. That just sent me over the top and I started cumming. Besides me being probably the only grown naked women he had ever seen, I was also the first naked woman he had ever seen masturbate to orgasm!
When we finished cumming I jokingly said 'that wasn't so bad was it?'
We talked for a long time after that. I told him that if he ever wanted to masturbate he could openly and freely do it anywhere in the house he wanted or in front of me. I also told him that if I ever had the feeling to do it, the couch in the living room was fine with me, even if he was watching TV! We laughed and agreed.
My son and I now have a great relationship. We masturbate together almost every day. He especially likes it when I jack him off and I love to feel his hardness and I do enjoy giving him handjobs. He likes to finger my pussy and he tries to get me off but nobody can do that to me like I CAN DO IT to myself. Other than this act, I want to stress we don't do anything else sexual. I could never sleep with my son. I have reconciled this act within myself though. I don't miss not having a lover or a husband like I did before. It is sexual still, but not in an incest intercourse way. So ... some readers will probably think I'm warped, and some may understand.