I can't really remember when I started masturbating, I was too little. I do remember that I would hold my penis sort of like a sandwich, with both hands, and sort of 'flick' it back and forth. I remember having a dry orgasm, but I'm not sure if this is possible. I can't really remember how much I did this, but it must have been a lot, as I remember getting scabs from rubbing it raw. I actually told my mom about the scabs, but just told her my clothes rubbed it. I'm sure she know what was really happening, but she pretended not to and put lotion on it for me.
In about seventh grade I started jacking off in school. I would position my penis along my leg and do a one handed method of my way I learned to masturbate. I could really get going fast, almost like a vibrator. There was this one girl who I had known masturbated, and she sat next to me in computer class. I furiously masturbated through my pants with her sitting right next to me, but she gave no indication that she did. That was the first time I let myself blow my load in my pants. It was really weird feeling, so I went to the bathroom to try to clean up.
Another time I was in seventh or eighth grade science in the experiment room across from some of the hottest girls in the grade. I had purposely gone commando that day so I could more easily play with myself. This time I actually stuck my hand up my shorts and jacked off backhand. I looked straight at her and she must have know what I was doing as she spread her legs so I could look up her skirt (I went to a Catholic school where we wore uniforms). I didn't let myself shoot my load until I got home, but that sure turned me on.
I went through a period where I felt extremely guilty about masturbating, so I stared at a fan and repeated the words 'I will never masturbate ever again' over and over again. I made it for six months where even the slightest accidental pleasure would make me pray for God's forgiveness. During the six months I researched on the internet a lot and decided that it isn't a sin. That first ejaculation after that was extremely painful, and they would burn for a few weeks after that.
Now I don't feel guilty at all, but I still have a problem. I have OCD and part of it is that I DO NOT want my semen, genital area, or butt to touch ANYTHING. I used to have to not be able touch anything for a day after masturbating, but I got over it by forcing myself to masturbate every day. I actually first came to this site to read about people masturbating and how they could get their cum or juices on a couch and not worry, or how they could do it in the car and just wipe it off. I wish I could do that, but I can't even touch something that touched something that touched my semen without being put through the washing machine or something. I would ask my counsellor to help me with this, but she is very hot and it would be embarrassing. Anybody's help would be appreciated.
Happy jacking and jilling