Masturbation has been a very frequent activity for me ever since I experienced my first orgasm about a month after turning 13. One of my female classmates described to a group of us exactly how to do it and how it felt. Needless to say I couldn't wait to get home and give it a try. After going to bed earlier than usual, I shut off the light, got under the covers, hiked up my nightie and experimented for about an hour without much progress. Even so, I was clearly having a LOT of fun.
Things were getting a little hot under the comforter because it was early September, but I wanted to continue and see if something might happen. I pushed the covers aside, slid out of my nightie, and tossed it to the floor by the bed. Having only recently entered puberty, I could easily see my vulva by tipping my hips up a bit and I figured I'd turn on the light to get a better view of what I was doing. Dimming the light, I laid back in bed on top of the sheets, this time experiencing a whole new set of feelings and joyous freedom as the cool air blowing through the open window caressed my exposed, naked body. I savored those feelings for a few minutes before slowly spreading my legs. My pelvis tingled when the fresh air wafted over my crotch and newly emerging pubic hair. It felt incredibly sexy, much unlike anything I had experienced before. The whole situation was kind of risky too, since my parents don't believe in locks on bedroom doors.
I ran my hands lightly over my body for a couple of minutes, and my heart rate jumped and my breathing deepened. Eventually I reached down between my legs again and was astounded to find that my inner and outer lips had moved away from each other and the entire center area was wet. A closer look down there revealed a wide-open column of dampness taking on a darker pink color, almost red. The bedroom gradually filled with the mild scent of my newly discovered womanhood. Once again I slid my hand back to my clitoris and vulva, fingers moving up and down and in circles.
Everything was definitely feeling different now. At some point I realized my hand was moving faster as the minutes ticked on. The tingling and heaviness in my pelvis became close to unbearable as my heart raced and I panted heavily. I got a little scared and wondered if this was actually an orgasm or if I was hurting myself somehow. I would have stopped, but the girl at school said things would happen this way. Her advice was to just keep going and massaging myself no matter what.
The muscles in my body tensed as I manipulated my clitoris with increasing speed and pressure, my entire arm cycling up and down all the way to the shoulder. My other hand wandered down to my vaginal opening and found a soft mound of twitching, warm flesh, dripping with lubrication. I moved two fingers of that hand lightly against the orifice, in synch with the other hand working my clit. This heightened the intensity to a new level and for the first time I began to realize this is what orgasms are all about, even though I had no idea of what was about to happen. Instinctively I removed the one hand from my vaginal opening and quickened the action on my clitoris with the other while applying more pressure, really concentrating on that single erect organ of sensitive tissue sticking out from my crotch.
Just as it seemed the feelings could not become any more intense, everything broke loose all at once. My nipples hardened and pointed outward toward the ceiling. My buttock and hip muscles flexed in a manner that spread my legs apart so the sides of my knees practically touched the bed covers below. My back arched and I raised my butt slightly off the bed. An intense combination of warmth and electricity enveloped me, as the whole area between my hips seemed to fill up and was about to explode. I started hyperventilating.
This was IT, I thought, while a big smile went across my face. I moaned and my eyes slowly closed because I wanted to feel every sensation of the moment while my arm and hand moved as a single unit with only one purpose in mind. I was truly finding out what an orgasm feels like, or so I thought. But even this didn't prepare me for what happened next.
Totally without warning or any anticipation on my part, my heart began slamming away, each beat visibly moving my chest along with an audible rush of blood pumping through the vessels in my ears. My whole body went rigid and straight as a board. Only my feet, shoulders and head were in contact with the mattress, everything in between was up off the bed and my butt cheeks hovered about a foot in the air. My rib cage expanded with every labored gasp and I shrieked when convulsions gripped my pelvic region and quickly travelled outward to rock my entire being. Hips bucking uncontrollably with each contraction, I shot a few drops of some clear fluid which landed on my inner right thigh about halfway to the knee and dripped down to the back of my leg.
I did not want it to end. My arm stroked frantically and the convulsions kept up for what must have been over a minute. The bed shook with each violent hip thrust and there was a good amount of moaning coming from deep within my throat. I didn't worry too much about who might hear me and assumed everyone was asleep or watching television. Of course, the contractions finally weakened as my orgasm subsided. I lay there in a sweating heap, panting, marveling at what just happened. I was totally overcome by a mix of exhaustion and exhilaration.
A voice on the other side of the door startled me. 'Jamie, are you all right?'
Oh God! My mother heard me! I sprang up, sitting on the edge of the bed. 'Uh, yeah Mom! I'm okay, I'm okay, I'm fine.' I was light-headed and still seeing stars when the doorknob moved. I hopped up and threw myself against the door. 'Everything's fine Mom, you don't have to come in!' She said okay and walked back to her room.
That was way too close, and it really scared me. No more masturbating, I thought as I shut off the light. It isn't worth it. My mother would die if she found out, and I would too. I stumbled back to my bed, collapsed onto it, and immediately fell asleep naked.
The bright morning sun awakened me. I felt groggy but strangely at piece, then I remembered why. Mmmmmmmm, nice feeling! The covers were over me too, and I figured I woke up sometime during the night and pulled them on. Reaching down to the floor for my nightie, I felt the rug. Looking up wearily, I saw it neatly draped over the chair in front of my vanity. Over the chair!? Mom was in here!! What did she see? My nightie on the floor made it obvious I fell asleep in the nude. I got this horrible sinking feeling in my stomach and a kind of burning around my face and ears, with dizziness setting in a few seconds later. I was never this embarrassed in my life! I took my robe off the hook on the back of my bedroom door, wrapped it around me and took a deep breath. Have to face Mom and think up some kind of excuse.
Mom was downstairs in the kitchen when I wandered in nonchalantly. She said good morning and asked if I'd like pancakes for breakfast, and I said that was fine. She didn't mention anything unusual or act strangely in any way. That had me wondering, so after an uncomfortable silence which seemed to last forever, I asked, 'Mom, were you in my room anytime before I woke up?'
She answered, 'Honey, I was a little worried this morning and thought I should check. When I looked in, I didn't want your father or your brother seeing you that way so I covered you.'
We stood there just staring at each other, neither of us really knowing what to say. My throat tightened and tears welled up in my eyes before I lost it entirely and broke down in sobs. As I buried my face in my hands, Mom pulled me to her and gave me a long hug. 'Ssshhhh, don't worry, everything's fine,' she whispered.
I kept sobbing. 'Mom, I feel so horrible! I didn't mean to fall asleep like that, don't be mad at me. I'm ashamed of myself! Don't think I'm bad or something, okay? Please?'
She sat me down and took a chair beside me. 'Honey, look, when girls get to be your age, they do certain things when they're alone because they need to sometimes. They touch themselves in a very special way on some very private parts of their bodies to relieve these strong feelings we all get. Do you know what kind of touching I might be talking about?'
Still looking down, avoiding her gaze, I nodded slightly.
Mom continued, 'There's nothing wrong with doing that, just so you know. I mean, there have even been times when I did it.' I looked at her with amazed, bloodshot eyes. She asked, 'Is that what you were doing last night, dear?'
A few seconds went by. I nodded and began crying again, only this time it was more from relief than embarrassment. I began to explain between sobs, 'Some girls at school...yesterday...we were all...talking about...'
Mom hugged me again. 'You're becoming a young woman, Jamie. You get these feelings, and that's part of growing up. Sometimes you have to deal with them on your own. It's certainly better than letting a boy give you a disease or get you pregnant. Especially at your age.'
I said, 'Well, no more for me. I won't do it again. Promise.'
She retorted, 'Oh yes you will. I know you will. Especially after what you felt last night.'
Feigning puzzlement, I asked, 'What do you mean?'
'I heard you, dear. Don't worry, no one else did.' Then she added with a little giggle and a sly grin, 'Must have been a good one, huh?'
That got me laughing a little and I sniffed hard. 'Yeah, it was more than anything I expected.'
She asked, 'You mean it was your first?' I said yes, then she just smiled and got this glassy look in her eyes like she was going to cry too. Now I know why, although at the time I couldn't figure that out. She asked me to make a promise, one that I CAN keep.
'Promise me that when your father and brother are home, you'll keep the noise down, okay?'
We both had a good laugh with that one. I answered yes, then quickly added, 'There won't be a need to keep anything down because I'm not doing it again.' Mom just smiled and shook her head.
Well, about a week after that first scary experience, I resumed masturbating as my mother predicted I would. Since then, I have continued to do it, on average, two or three times a day, often with multiple orgasms. It just feels too good!
A few years have passed since then. Mom and I have had many discussions about sex, guys, and masturbation. She still masturbates ('Tell your father and I'll kill you!') even though she loves Dad and says he keeps her happy in bed. Sometimes, she told me, you just have to give yourself a little quality time alone. We discussed techniques, multiple orgasms, ways to make it feel better and fun uses for a showerhead. Sometimes I don't even close the bedroom door when I have to masturbate and Mom is the only one home, although she's not quite so liberal to do the same when I'm around. On my 15th birthday she gave me an extra present, a 'little personal secret between us', an electric plug-in vibrator with different attachments, two of which are obviously insertable. Mom explained that the battery models break easily because they don't hold up to heavy use (wink) and all those batteries would get awfully expensive (wink wink).
At 16, I lost my virginity to a guy I really liked a lot, and never regretted it. During our very first intercourse I had an incredibly wild orgasm which, I'm sure, was due to all the 'practice' I did alone. If I didn't keep myself satisfied through masturbation before that time in my life, I know I would have gotten involved in sex at an earlier age before I was ready.
I just want to say, 'Thanks Mom.'