I am writing this story because I feel that I masturbate, and have learned to masturbate differently than other people have, I think! I am hoping by writing of my experiences, possibly others can let me know if their experiences are similar or if I am indeed different.
I might as well tell you about my first memories of masturbation. I can remember when I was only two-years-old and was lying in bed for an afternoon nap but wasn't tired. All of a sudden one of my hands was playing with my stomach and pressed my belly button. When it did, I felt something in my penis, something like tingling and it felt good. I continued to do that pressing my belly button in and out. After just a minute the feeling was gone though. The next day however, at the same nap time I remembered what I felt the night before. This time I was lying on my stomach and not my back and I was really thinking about my penis, not my belly button, since the penis is what felt good when I played with my belly.
I don't know how I discovered this per-say but with my left hand, my earliest childhood memories involved making a fist with my left hand and rubbing the penis in my bedroom lying down on my stomach. My clothes were on when I did this, I never thought to try it naked. I also remember when I was finished, I always felt like I had to go to the bathroom. It was a wierd sensation for me and I wondered why this made me have to go to the washroom everytime I was finished. I can also remember experimenting and wondering why it didn't work with my right hand but only my left. One interesting thing though, I never did this in front of people, for some reason even at the age of two, I knew not to do this around people and only by myself.
During these early years, I would only masturbate in my bedroom or in a bed, and if I heard anyone opening my door I would quickly stop as I would be too embarrassed if I were to get caught. The frequency of me masturbating in my younger years were about once to three times a week. I always did it each sunday afternoon when I was put to bed for a nap after church. Then I did it sometimes once or twice a week when waking up or falling asleep, if I got the urge to do it. Anyway, what I find interesting is, most people who talk about how they learned to masturbate, always talk about someone showing them, or something, but I had figured it out by myself. I was also doing it without having an erection at this age, and it appears everyone else masturbated with an erection. It also seems everyone else either lies on there back instead of there stomach. So I am just wondering if I am normal or if anyone out there has similar experiences.
When I was five or so, I had my first erection. My clothes were on and I was in front of others too, and I didn't know what it was. I wanted to touch it or try to make it soft again but knew not to touch myself in front of others. I never knew what it was and it had worried me, I didn't know everyone's penis did that sometimes involuntary and that it would soon go soft again. Anyway, I remember getting these once in a while as a child but at that age they were annoying.
When I was eleven years old, my method of masturbating changed slightly. I was trying to do it with my fist lying on my stomach, and I guess my penis had grown bigger or something and it didn't work. I couldn't move my fist over it anymore. I wanted to do it, the urge was there but I couldn't. I'm not sure what happened but I soon figured out an alternative method that I, to this day, use the most. I take my unerect penis while lying in bed and I point it towards my left hip. I still make a fist with my left hand but now the fist part touches the shaft of the penis and the thumb rubs the head part of it. I was happy at age eleven to figure out a new way that worked, but I spent a lot of time wondering why the old one didn't work anymore, I now assume my penis grew and that is maybe why it didn't work. At this age, after using the new method, I started to ejaculate whenever finishing. I didn't know what it was though when it first happened, and it was very messy and felt uncomfortable after. I also noticed not feeling like I had to go to the washroom after masturbating anymore. I wondered if ejaculating was doing it in my pants instead, but I noticed that the fluid that came out didn't look like urine, I wasn't sure what it was. Then it happened again next time I masturbated and each time after. Eventually I got used to this as being normal for me.
When I was ten or so, I no longer masturbated with my pyjamas on, for one thing I stopped wearing pyjamas, so after the age of ten, if I masturbated in my room, I was only wearing my underwear. I can remember once when I was twelve, I took my underwear off and masturbated my penis directly in the same method I always did though. But I only did it once as rubbing my penis on the bed lying on my stomach directly with my fingers seemed to hurt it a little, and also when ejaculation came if I wasn't wearing my underwear it was so messy as I found out that time.
When I was twelve, I was babysitting my cousin and he was little and I was giving him a bath. I noticed he was wiggling his penis in the tub and I wondered if it felt good to him like rubbing my penis in bed felt good. So far, I had only masturbated in bed but now I saw someone else do it. I finally knew other people masturbated, and I knew they did it in other places such as bathtubs. The next time I had a bath, I tried to masturbate in the tub with my bedroom method. But it wasn't very ideal there, the tub was small and again it hurt a bit to touch my penis directly with my fingers lying on my stomach in the tub. Then I decided, well, what if I wiggle it like the guy I saw was doing? So I lay on my back and began to wiggle it with my left hand. I didn't really feel anything but my penis started to get erect and I was instantly sad because I knew how uncomfortable erections felt like for me. Anyway, with the erection, I began to rub my penis. I took my left hand with two fingers on the bottom of my penis, and the thumb on the other side of the bottom of my penis. I rubbed up and down the shaft and it felt good, not as good as how I did it in bed but still enjoyable. But it was time consuming in the bathtub, ejaculations took often an hour or more to achieve, where doing it in bed took twenty to forty minutes. Discovering a new way to masturbate was interesting though as I was finally doing it at least in the tub in a more normal way, getting an erection first, and also lying on my back, not my stomach. At this age after discovering masturbating in the tub, I soon got the urge to do it so much more often as I was getting older. I soon began masturbating at least four times a week in my bed, either before sleeping or after waking. I only used my new method that I found in the tub about twice a month at first as it didn't feel as good as the other method, and also took lots of time when others wanted to use the bathroom too. I also worried that my family might wonder what I am up to lying in the tub and not using water for such a long time.
Not long after discovering I could masturbate in the tub and in bed I started to explore masturbating in other positions and places. I wanted to see if I could masturbate standing up in the shower or sitting in a chair. I found masturbating standing up harder to do and not feeling that good either and more of a waste of time. Sitting down I learned to do when I was at camp for a week when I was fifteen and had no privacy in the cabin at night time to masturbate, not even privacy in the shower as we showered in front of others, sort of. I had a big urge to do it after a few days there, so I went to the toilets, locked the door and tried to masturbate by sitting and having an erection. I pulled the foreskin over the head of the penis and rolled it back and forth with my hands for about an hour till a release came.
Now, I am 25 years old and I still masturbate in bed the way I always have as a child and I do it about twice a week and sometimes three or four. It is still my favorite way to masturbate although I also masturbate in the bathtub too about once a week using the way I figured out myself in the tub. When I was sixteen or so and finally knew what masturbation was, and that what I was doing was masturbation, I started having all kinds of questions about it, normally about how often other people do it, and about how they do it, and about how most people began to discover it, how they did it their first time, and I always wanted to hear about someone discovering or having experiences masturbating the same way as me, but I never dared to ask the questions or talk about them.
When I was 21, I finally had internet on my computer and with my door locked, I would look for information on-line about how others do it. I would read about all these methods, even try most of them but none of them ever felt really good or compared to what I feel when I do it. I wondered if I was doing them wrong, and I still never found the real information for questions about masturbation that I have been looking for all my life. It seems like the information I read about is rarely describing any of my personal experiences yet. How did I discover masturbating on my own, when most others are shown how to do it at a later age or they find out about it somehow? Has anyone discovered it on there own as a young child? Does anyone remember masturbating as a child lying on there stomach and do they still do it that way? Does anyone 'not have an erection' and masturbate like me, or am I just not normal? Do most people masturbate naked or do they wear at least underwear like I do? Those are just a few things I have always been looking for