Masturbating With Lovers (Part2)

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Masturbating With Lovers (Part1)

 

I think of this time as the moment I became a truly sexual being. I had had lots of sex before, had been having intercourse regularly for a couple of years, had masturbated from time to time for over 6 years, though had never really just loved doing it. I did for a reason - so I could sleep or stop feeling horny, not because I just loved doing it.

For some reason we didn't speak about what had happened. I wanted to but at the same time felt very unsure of myself and the subject of masturbation. Nice girls don't masturbate, well not in front of their boyfriends anyway. I was scared of the change that had occurred. Really I should have just talked to him about it but whenever I was about to mention it, I lost my nerve and said something else instead.

The incident played on my mind, at work I found myself day-dreaming about him pleasuring himself in front of me and me in front of him. On nights when we were apart I struggled to fall asleep without stroking myself to orgasm fantasizing about what had happened. The thought of being naked, pleasuring myself while he watched was terrifying yet I knew deep down that it was what I truly wanted to repeat.

For the next 3 occasions when we were together we had sex as before, pleasuring each other, he would spend ages licking me to orgasm or we would fuck each other passionately, yet I still wanted to masturbate before his eyes. To show him I was brave enough, to confront my own fears.

A week later we were on the sofa, he whispered in my ear for me to undress, I sat naked waiting for him to begin to caress me, to move onto the floor so he could feast on my pussy while I relaxed on the sofa my legs spread apart as he liked to do but no.

'I want to watch you masturbate,' he said. This was it. I froze. My fears returned, my body felt cold, I looked away from him. I was terrified. But I wanted this moment. I closed my eyes. I pushed my back up against the sofa and tried to find a comfortable position. The energy wasn't there, that intense urge that had driven me on the last time. I was naked, vulnerable, I opened my eyes for a second then moved so I could rest my head in his lap as he had done that initial time.

This was it. I felt a surge of power. We were connected, he stroked my face gently, tenderly. 'Take your time' he spoke gently.

I had little to build on. I wasn't wet yet. My body wasn't warmed up, I wondered whether I could do it, whether I would have to fake it but that would be defeating myself. Slowly parts of my body responded to my touch. I thought of the previous time, when I had pleasured myself in front of him, not knowing if he was watching.

He stroked my hair, seeming relaxed, happy to wait for me. I wanted to feel his cock becoming erect as I rested my head against his lap but there was no movement. Eventually my juices emerged and I began to get into the rhythm of stroking myself. My fingers pleasuring me as I relaxed into it. It was lovely just being there with him. I felt so happy. The horror had disappeared and I was masturbating for my own pleasure not to get off or to orgasm but because it felt great.

We changed position a few times, I let him get a good look at my pussy as it soaked up the pleasure. When I came I stopped for a short while to recuperate then started again. This was so different to any of my usual masturbation experiences. I wasn't trying to get it over so I could sleep or do something else.

This was my breakthrough. It was a very intense week or so. But afterwards I could happily masturbate in front of him, usually just to tease him I think but I didn't rely on him for my pleasure so much and stroking myself was pretty great.

We soon settled into a routine of once a week masturbating in front of each other. I would spend ages thinking of what I would do the next time to surprise him, to show him how sexual I was. It was an amazing year or so.

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