A history of masturbation and sexual self discovery over my lifetime
I can honestly say that I have no recollection of awareness of my own sexuality until this occasion. The family of a childhood friend I'll call Steve, and my family had moved from the apartment complex where we had lived to houses in adjacent towns. I was visiting him at his new home. It was a hot summer day, and his family had set up one of those shallow, temporary backyard swimming pools that were commonly used at that time. His mother sent us upstairs to his room to change into our swimsuits, while she used the garden hose to fill up the pool.
Once we got upstairs to his room, Steve closed the door, took off his shirt, undid his belt buckle, and dropped his pants and underwear. I was curious to see his cock, not having seen someone else's before, and he may have sensed this, who knows? Anyway, instead of putting on his suit, Steve lay back on his bed with his legs dangling off the side. As he did, his penis started to grow into a full fledged erection. I don't recall having been aware of my own erections prior to this, although I'm sure I must have had them. Steve told me to lay down on the bed bedside him, and 'expose myself to the air', and that if I did so my 'dick' would grow, too. A bit uncertain, I did as he instructed and almost immediately got the first hard on that I recall. Although he was about two years older than me, our dicks were about the same size, and we were both circumcised which was almost always the case for boys in the United States at that time. The only real difference between our penises was that, being a redhead, his skin was very fair and his glans was very purple compared to mine. As we lay there side by side without pants and undershorts around our ankles and our hard pricks sticking straight up, he suggested we 'play a game'.
Steve had us lay side by side, and we 'jousted' for a while with our erect penises, which was kind of cool. He then suggested that I lie on top of him and rub my prick on his stomach. This didn't do anything for me, so we switched places and he demonstrated to me how to gently thrust and rub his cock on the soft skin of my belly, saying how good it felt. I then got on top and followed his example, and wow, it sure did feel GOOD (it was only many years later that I learned that this is called 'frottage'). Before long, his mother called upstairs that the water was ready and we should hurry up getting changed and come out to the backyard, which ended our mutual exploration session.
We got together for similar sex play perhaps a half dozen times over two years, but always when our families were nearby so we couldn't continue for very long. We did some other things that the rules of the site won't allow me to discuss, but neither of us ever came anywhere close to orgasm. I certainly wasn't aware that it was possible, and I don't think Steve was either. What's remarkable about our experiences was that we never actually touched each other's pricks (it was an unspoken rule, as I recall). Steve broke off our sessions (he was almost 13 by the time), without ever telling me or showing me about masturbation (if he even knew himself, which I suspect he did).
After these experiences, I was now very much aware of sexuality and erections, in fact, now being age eleven, it seemed I had one almost all the time! Although I had ambivalent feelings about our earlier activities, I certainly missed the fantastic sensations I'd felt in my cock. We also had some decent introductory sex education in school at around this time, so I began to consider how I could experience those kinds of feelings on my own (there was no mention of masturbation in the basic reproductive information we were given, that's for sure!). I figured that something that simulated intercourse would be a good bet, so I tried several. First, I tried thrusting into my bed with a pillow on it, sort of like the 'game' Steve and I had played. That felt good, but was very tiring, and certainly didn't do anything to make my erections less! Then I tried wrapping a silky nylon 'speedo' type bathing suit around my shaft and surrounding it with a towel, and humping that. This was a definite improvement, and felt really good but I still felt vaguely unsatisfied.
Around this time, I discovered that my Dad had a copy of the Kinsey Report book in the house (this treasure was a result of a management course he'd taken years ago in college). What a fantastic book for a horny but unguided and shy adolescent! I read every page, and was astounded at the range of normal variation in male sexual experiences and frequencies, and there I learned that masturbation existed and that almost all guys did it, mostly 'using the usual technique,' a frustrating reference if ever there was one! I also learned that my earlier experiences with Steve were quite a common experience for boys growing up. In any event, the section on masturbation mentioned that some men did it by rubbing against their leg or another object. As I had no idea what the 'usual method' was, and I'd already tried rubbing my cock against other things, I was determined to try rubbing my dick on my thigh.
I waited until a day that I was alone at home, lay down on my bed and removed all my clothes. As usual, my penis got hard immediately (this tendency was becoming a nuisance at gym classes at school by now!). I explored my cock thoroughly, and noticed that it felt best to lightly touch it on the underside, just below the head, near where the band of brownish skin at the edge of my circumcision was. With that observation, I bent my erect penis down and over to the left, so that I could rub the underside back and forth on the smooth skin of my thigh. Now THAT felt great, just what I'd been looking for! I don't recall having dry orgasms, but about six months during one of my sessions, I felt a truly spectacular feeling in my dick and the whole rest of my body, and a relatively small amount of clear sticky fluid shot out of the opening of my penis. At first I thought I'd urinated, but I realized I'd never had urine anything like that, so I figured out that it was the beginnings of semen production, and that I'd just had my first ejaculation (I knew all the proper terms as a result of the Kinsey book, but none of the slang ones!). In short order, I was masturbating two or three times a day at least, and my semen became the more usual milky white color. The book didn't say anything about lubrication, so my penis got pretty sore and even got a scab on it from all the rubbing. Eventually, I learned to be gentler and slower, so that kept my prick from getting irritated.
I still had no idea what the elusive 'usual method' was (and I was pretty sure it wasn't how I did it). When I was about thirteen and attending a sleep away camp, I heard some of the guys make reference to 'jerking off' and 'beating off' and eventually figured out that this referred to masturbation. It didn't seem a very apt description of the way I did it, but then one day one of the older guys made a stroking gesture with his hands while telling some one to go jerk off, and that night in my bunk I used the 'usual method,' The Fist, for the first time. It was a little different from what I was used to, but it rapidly became my technique of choice, in part because it was much easier on the equipment without having to bend it! My deductions were further confirmed by another guy in our cabin giving a j/o demonstration one night. Although I desperately wanted to see how he did it, he was on the bunk above me, so I couldn't see him without getting up, and I didn't want to be teased for being a 'fag'. Nevertheless, it was clear he was stroking his cock up and down as I had recently learned to do. I had clearly joined the mainstream of males in the 'usual method'.
I remained rather shy, and had no sexual experiences (other than a real lot of masturbation. By the way, I like the British slang term 'wanking' much better than our American ones) in High School or College. My last college roommate, Chester, and I had a great relationship, and we talked about our sexuality quiet a lot, although (unfortunately) we never masturbated together. We admitted to each other our first week together that we both masturbated, and upon gentle questioning by me, he revealed that he'd also discovered masturbation for himself without being shown or told about it.
When I met my future wife, our sex life was limited to masturbation because we both felt that it was morally wrong to do anything more than that before marriage. I was rather surprised that she had never masturbated, and although I was completely inexperienced, it was a huge turn on for me to do it to her for the first time, which was accompanied by her first orgasm ever (are women ever more beautiful than then?). By the time she came, I finally understood the literal meaning of all those descriptions of 'my cock straining to get free of my pants' - my schlong was literally like a rod of iron! I was thrilled when she reciprocated by loosening up my belt and sliding her hand into my shorts and grasping my truly 'throbbing manhood'. She was even more inexperienced (if that was possible) than I, so I guided her as she stroked me, her hand still inside my pants. Because she was lying beside me, this wound up being with a sort of backhand grip, which I'd never used before and felt different but incredibly exciting. Needless to say, it was a short time before I shot a tremendous quantity of semen, which she rubbed into the skin of my abdomen until it dried up. How erotic! We continued to explore our sexuality solely through mutual masturbation until our wedding day.
Since our marriage, despite how much I enjoy sex with my wife, I've continued to masturbate regularly. It's different from partner sex and I can take care of excess horniness when she's tired, ill, or unavailable. The first time she caught me doing it, she was somewhat upset that I didn't come to her for all of my sexual needs. I explained to her that I'd been masturbating since I was age 11, and that I expected to continue to do so until I was at least 90. At the same time, I also promised her that my hands were the only affair that my cock was ever going to have as long as we were married, and I've never been seriously tempted to break that promise.
Thanks for listening to my long story. I think it's great that there are places on the web like Solo Touch where young (and not so young) guys can come to safely learn about their sexuality, including not having to wait years to learn about lubricants and 'the usual method'.