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Guilt

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I had been masturbating for five years when I first learned that this was considered immoral. I was very secretive about my masturbation, and first discussed it with my best friend when I slept over at his house one weekend.

 

Like most boys, I early learned that rubbing my penis felt good. By the time I was nine, I was into masturbating by holding my penis between my thumb and forefinger and stroking it until I had an orgasm. Of course, I didn't know that that was the propper name for the pleasant feeling I produced this way. I didn't begin to ejaculate until I was 14, and I realized that I shouldn't do this where anyone else could see what I was doing although by that time I heard the usual talk the boys engage in at that age. So I wasn't surprsed when my friend asked me if I jerked off when we were in his room after supper. I admitted that I did, and asked him if he did as well. He admitted he did, and suggested that we jerk off together. I hesitated, but agreed. So after we showered, when we were in his room with the door locked, he stripped off his pj, got a tub of vaseline out of his night stand, lubbed up and began stroking. I did the same, and after about ten minutes of stroking we both came. We cleaned up and went to sleep. The next morning we did it again, and this became a regular two or three times a week event for us. After we had done this for about a week, he asked me what penance the priest gave me for jerking off. I replied that I never discussed this with a priest. He told me I should, and that's how I learned that I was doing something prohibited. After this, I felt very guilty about masturbating, but in a way the guilt enhanced the enjoyment. It didn't keep me or my friend from our pecker pleasure.

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