Take the biggest cucumber you can find and cut off both ends-one for your cock and the other for ventilation. With a knife or spoon, scoop out the insides until your hard cock will just fit in. Let the cucumber warm up by wrapping it in hot towels, or putting it in the microwave on defrost for a minute.
You can use a litle lube if you want, but the cucumber gets plenty slick. Put the head of your cock against the hole. The tightest ass or pussy you ever had. Roll it around on the head of your cock like a pair of warm wet lips. Gradually let your cock slide deeper into the hole and work it up and down your shaft. You can put it between a couple of pillows and fuck it like crazy too. I like to force my cock all the way through and when I cum it shoots out the end.
For a little different feel, try it with a condom. Put the condom on the tip of your cock and use the cucumber to unroll it down your shaft. This is good for guys like me who shoot sooner than they would like.