It's come down to this. But it is better than nothing.
Because of our age and health problems, sex has become difficult at best. ED is a factor and the suppository I use isn't as efficient as Viagra, which I cannot use because I take nitrates for chest pain. My wife has emphysema, had difficutly breathing, has little strength and has an adversity to semen. Sex is very infrequent, three times last in the past year and always there is negotiation, before, during and after, which is a turn off for me. I have been masturbating to porn on the internet. We have tried her giving me a hand job but she 'tires' and I have to finish myself off in front of her. Her usual request is 'don't squirt on me.'
The other evening we planned to hand job later in the evening, but when the time came she declined, frustrating me to no end since I was looking forward to her caressing my balls as I wanked. She said I'll give you the whole thing in the morning, so I agreed imagining a nice romp the next day. Tomorrow came and I prepared to run some errands before sex. She then stated, 'Do you still want that hand job? I said I thought you wanted to fuck today. She replied you have to go out so lets just do that thing. More frustration, but I dropped my pants and approached her chair. She fondled my cock for a few minutes, got tired and said I better finish myself. She held my balls in her hand and caressed them as I wanked, again the statement don't cum on me. I shot a rusty load in my hand having a happy ending. Then the clincher came, if this works for you maybe we should do it this way from now on. It's not all fun and games in old age.