I am a divorced father of two kids, one of them is 12 and the other is 17. The 17-year-old was in an accident a few years ago that left him without many of the abilities we take for granted, he cannot feed himself without help and he cannot dress himself and he has very minimal communication skills. My wife recently sent my children to live with me because she has some issues where we both agreed that I would be better able to care for the kids.
My question is in regards to my older son, when changing him I notice that he frequently gets erections and they usually last for a few minutes or more. I do not know yet if he is having nocturnal emissions as I have not seen any evidence of that.
I talked to another parent that has a 19-year-old in a similar condition and they admitted that they will do this on average about once a week. The particular parent that I talked with said that they have been 'helping' in this manner ever since it became necessary. I didn't probe any further to see how long that meant but I assume since mid puberty.
I asked this question on a parenting message board and was called every name in the book but as a father and not a pervert I want to know if helping my son in this manner either now or in six weeks when he turns 18 would be appropriate. Please note that this is not for a sexual thrill for me but I feel that with my son being a young man who is almost 18 who cannot relieve himself sexually it seems to me that this could be beneficial for him and certainly could not hurt.