I bought a sword at a local counrty-type store. It was cheap, like $20, and I never thought about anal play. No, I didn't stick the sword in my ass---the handle was rounded at the tip and could be removed from the blade.
So, one night I was on here looking at stories and techniques, and I read a few on anal play. So I was horny and gave it a shot. I got a plastic bag out, turned it inside out and put it over the sword handle. I lubed it up with spit and began to ease it in my ass. It felt gross at first but then it became enjoyable. I first started with pens and markers but increased to the sword handle.
Today, I don't use the sword handle anymore. I use a knight stick (those clubs police officers have) and use the same technique with the bag and lube. Once you're finished, just turn the bag inside out and cover your penis with an old sock and there is no clean up. I tried to stretch my hole by using the end of a flashlight, which is four inches in diamiter. It isn't easy to get in, but once you do, it is heaven. I could pump for hours. I have also tried ice cubes which was very very pleasing. Just make sure you have a cloth or towel underneath you for when your ass melts the cubes.
If anyone else uses methods like these to masturbate, let me know.