A Voice From the Past

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About two years ago I received an e-mail message out of the blue from a distant relative who I had not seen since we were both children. She, like myself, now has kids of her own. I was surprised, to say the least, in hearing from her. For one thing she must have gone through a great deal of trouble to find my email address. We exchanged a few messages about ourselves and how our lives had turned out. Finally she told me the real reason she had contacted me. When I was very young, about 6, (she would have been about 9 at the time) we lived in different apartments within the same four-unit building. I have only the most patchy and faint memory of the events about which she was calling, but they involved playing house in the shared basement, with some neighborhood boy her age being the 'daddy', she the 'mommy', and me and her younger brother being the children. I recall there was a large galvanized tub, and 'mommy' and 'daddy' would take off her brother's and my clothes, and put us together in the empty tub for a pretend bath. Afterwards 'mommy' and 'daddy' would 'dry us off' with towels from the clothing hamper, and dress us up in her old underpants, dresses that she had outgrown, and ladies' shoes and hats. I also remember pulling down my pants for pretend spankings. I can hardly recall these events at all and had not thought of them for years and years. But she searched me out because she said that she had felt guilty over those games all these years, and had to find out if she had harmed my development in any way. I thought her worry was funny, but I tried to take it seriously and did my best to reassure her, since she was obviously very troubled by it.

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