A History -extreme Edging and Depression

Posted by: Author: Age: 24 Posted on: 1 comments
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I am white 5'10' 135 pounds brown hair and have been since high school. Runners body.



I don't remember when I started masturbating. Until high school I always humped pillows or sheets. At some point in elementary school my mom saw me doing it in the living room and told me not to do it in public. This is all the sex ed I got from my parents. Before that I thought I had an discovered the most amazing thing in the world and wondered why no one else but me had figured it out. I went to Catholic school and was soon told it was a sin. Wanting to be moral I struggled relentlessly with my urges. This was my first introduction to edging.



In high school I looked up porn for the first time. I had overheard something about lesbians and just had to see it for my self. This began a life long obsession. Soon after I discovered Solo Touch and the traditional male methods of masturbation. However it was extremely hard for me to orgasm this way. So I mostly stuck to my old method.



I was a loser in high school and elementary school. I went to a mostly guys engineering school. Too this day I have never been kissed and I have battled with depression my whole life. I soon learned the truth about religion and lost my issues with masturbation.



In grad school the combination of very good porn, my inbuilt difficulty in orgasming in the traditional way, and extreme hedonism led me to seriously start practicing edging.



My record is masturbating for 10 hours without orgasm. I have learned to hate orgasms. I am only not depressed when I am on a sex high. So I hate orgasm killing it. Although I have also managed eight orgasms in a day using my humping meathod. I have obtained sex highs way beyond what most people have alone. This is because of extensive practice alone that most people never get. It is one of the few ways for me to be happy.



I exclusively watch lesbian porn and read stories during masturbation. I have read every F FF story on here. I have also read a large proportion of the other stories.



Reading this has given me some interesting incites. For example their is far more homosexuality and bi-sexuality for both sexes that picked up in traditional surveys. The normal explanations of this is that people do not answer the surveys truthfully or that Solo Touch has a distorted user base.



A closer analysis reveals however that many people despite obviously and admittedly being sexually attracted to the other sex do not consider themselves homo or even bi sexual. At first this mystified me being straight. I eventually discovered what I believe to be the true cause of the discrepancy.



People label their sexuality based on romantic attraction not sexual attraction. We really should describe people not as hetero, homo, or bi. Rather as Romantic homo, hetero, or bi and Sexual homo, hetero, or bi. And even those are sliding not discrete scales.



I am a masturbation addict. Most people decide to masturbate because they get horny. They have a sexy thought or see something that turns them on.



This is no longer true for me. First I feel depressed and decide I want to feel good. Then I decide to make my self horny. Then I masturbate.



This is probably not healthy. My sex drive is strangely cyclical. I will spend a week using all my free time masturbating and then lose my sex drive for a week completely. It is quite bizarre.



Anyway, thank you Solo Touch for giving me a place to vent and read. I wish everyone the best. But I especially want to reach out to all the lonely people out there. I want to hug everyone of you and tell you it will be ok.

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