A Brief History

Posted by: Author: Age: 30 Posted on: 0 comments
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Solo reminds me of my experimental past... and makes me wish I had been more courageous...


I will say that I've become slightly addicted to this site. It's brought up so many memories, thoughts, and fantasies. I'd like to share my self-discovery in this entry...thoughts and fantasies are for another entry :)

I have no idea how old I was when I started exploring my own body. I know that I did not feel any "wrong"; that is, until my mother's religious leanings made me recognize that (from her point of view) sex and being sexual were not okay (until, of course, marriage and closed doors to hide behind). I have always been overtly sexual, I have always had an interest in other's bodies (both male and female), I have always enjoyed the way my body responds to different stimuli.

When I was very young, maybe 5? I used to play with Morris, a neighbor down the street. One day we ended up in the bathroom. All I remember is comparing our bodies; down on all fours. We had different parts and were using our eyes and hands to compare them. Needless to say, my mom walked in on us and broke it up.

My next-door neighbors had young girls around our age (I had to be 7 or so by then). One of the girls (I don't remember her name) and I used to play "doctor" in the basement. We would take off our pants and underwear, and push up our shirts (neither of us were developed at all...blessedly smooth vulvas and tiny buds of breasts) but we would take turns lying on a sheet on the floor checking each other out. Spreading our fingers over our nipples, putting our ears against our chests to listen to the heartbeat, tracing our fingers along each other's labia. I remember feeling safe, and excited, and enjoying the feel of her feather-light touch on my body.

My next memory is seeing my first penis. It was in the cafeteria of my grade school (3rd grade, I believe). My friend Mickey (who was a cutie) was sitting between Sherri and I. She got him to show it to her, and I insisted that he show me as well. I was so curious! Then... Slightly disappointed as it turned out to look something like a Vienna sausage ;) but still, it piqued my interest. I knew so little about the opposite sex.

I had a cousin named Kathy who was about my age (at this time, probably around 10?). Their family visited rather infrequently, but they usually spent the nights. Kathy was very feminine and by far the favorite of the family; she was also in a curious stage. I was rather ...tomboyish, with short hair and a less feminine build. So of course, she would play the girl, and I would play the guy. I remember lying under the sleeping bag, and her telling me to act like I had a dick (which was laughable, considering all I had seen in the dick department). So I stuck my hand down my pants in a sort of fist. She started to slowly rub up and down my hand while touching her small breasts and pressing very closely against me. I remember the smell of her hair, the feel of her warm body next to mine, and the curious heat that came from my vulva while she pressed her hand against my fist.

Obviously I knew I was missing out on something. I started to recognize that I had a pleasure center. The trick? Finding out how to stimulate it. I began trying on my sister's shorts, which were too tight for me. I would hold the front and back of the shorts tight against my cunt; so tightly that the shorts slid up in between my labia. I shifted my hips back and forth slowly, loving the rough feel of the cloth against my pussy. I did this on several occasions, and I still have fantasies about being tied up with a length of smooth rope tightly fixed against my clit.

The reality of what masturbation was came through reading. I was babysitting at a neighbor's house (I believe I was around 12) and found her book "women: our bodies, our selves". Just have to say thank gods for this book. There were pictures of naked women... Their breasts and soft bodies, porcelain thighs and tangled pubic hair intrigued me. I learned a bit about how my body worked, and found the masturbation story that started my life-long trend. The story was from a woman who described masturbating in the shower. I *had* to try it.

When I got home, I went straight to the shower. Our shower had an old showerhead on it, and if the water pressure was just right, it would come out in one hard, steady stream. I wasn't quite sure what to do, so I turned the water on and laid against the back of the tub. After some adjustments, I felt the stream hitting my mound. I will never forget that feeling (it's difficult to, since I continue to masturbate in this, my absolute favorite way)... I knew I was entering something new and entirely different in my life. I scooted down in the tub, and spread my legs, resting my feet against the door and the wall. I didn't know to touch myself, so I moved my hips slightly...and was instantly rewarded by the warm, pulsing jet of water sliding between my labia. My body knew to take over for my uninformed brain, and I raised my hips against the stream. The delicious feeling of the water pounding my sensitive pussy lips produced waves of pleasure rolling from my cunt up through my belly and into my limbs. On the brink of these feelings, I lifted and lowered my hips against the stream, uncaring of my parents in the living room, uncaring of anything but the feelings in my body. The water caressed my labia like a strong, vibrating tongue and I rode it for a while... until inadvertendly i felt a jolt. I had found my clit. I backed off for a moment, then took the plunge and spread my legs further, lifting my swollen, overcharged mound to the stream. This steady stream pummeled my clit and I felt a tremendous heat in the palms of my hands and soles of my feet... Then crested the wave of my first orgasm, my body shaking, my head arched back in the tub. Needless to say, I took many, many long showers after that. Sometimes twice a day ;)

(I lament the loss of the shower in my last apartment... I could completely remove the showerhead and ride the stream standing up, which was challenging after the first few orgasms, but *well* worth it!)

After that, it was the routine of masturbation in the shower. It actually made me a bit lazy; I never explored manual stimulation of myself until much later in life (probably around 25?) But nothing compared to the shower. My personal record is six orgasms in 15 minutes... I have also had what are referred to as "g-spot" orgasms (meaning, female ejaculation) purely through clitoral stimulation. Intense.

Every chance I got, I rode a stream of water. I remember making up some ridiculous lie while at a friend's house, because we were swimming in the pool and I wanted to get her out of it so I could masturbate on the stream. She lived way out in the boonies on a farm, and the pool was by the field behind the barn. When she finally left, I pulled aside the crotch of my swimsuit and rode the jet, coming quickly in the glorious sunlight.

I remember being 16 and having my first "real" kiss... And the guy getting nervous because I was all about sexual exploration and he wasn't so sure of himself, or was thrown by the idea of an aggressive, curious girl. Because I was heavier in my high school days, I never had a boyfriend. I did, however, discover that at parties, guys would pretty much make out with anyone, and I perfected both the art of kissing and the art of the dry hump tease. A guy with a hard-on in jeans is still a huge turn on to me, as I think about straddling him naked and letting him feel the heat of my cunt penetrate his jeans as I slowly slide along his length. These kinds of thoughts bring me to orgasm over and over again.

At 17, my best friend Kelly asked if I wanted to try something with her boyfriend and her. We went over to his place, hung out in the Jacuzzi for a while. I remember seeing his penis, and it rubbing against my leg. We went back into his bedroom and had a very fumbling experience... Neither Kelly nor I knew exactly what to do, but I fully enjoyed watching her give him a blowjob, then watching them have sex while I slowly rubbed my clit into arousal. I still have tremendous voyeuristic thrills. Damned my shyness and insecurity!

After my shower experiences I started reading books with racy sexual scenes ... They excited me and made me feel the need to take care of myself. I spent many nights slowly humping my bed whilst reading the ravaging of some female heroine in the novels...I suppose that's how I ended up on this site, eventually. Reading still arouses me like nothing else! And to everyone's credit, I've had many fabulous satisfying orgasms thanks to solotouch contributions :)

(Sorry for the length! I got carried away!)



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