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Happy Birthday from the Wife

Last Saturday, I turned 60 and retired. We had a small party with friends, where, amongst other things, I got a set of golf clubs.

After our friends left, my wife Susan said, 'I have one more present for you. But I didn't want to give it to you in front of your friends from work. Don't take it the wrong way, and, if you want to, we can send it back'.

Now I was really curious. 'What is it?', I asked somewhat apprenhensively.

'Well, honey, I have a couple years left to work, and I know now that you are retired you are going to want to have sex more than I will. So I got you the male version of a dildo. I researched male sex aids on the Internet, read the reviews, and got the best selling male masturbation aid. This present combines your two favorite interests-gadgets and sex. Now, when I am too tired for sex, you will have this gadget to play with.'

'Let me see it', I said sceptically. 'I don't know, honey; I've been using my hand for 50 years. It works just fine. I think my hand and your vagina are all I need.'

'Oh Jim. Don't be a stick in the mud! Try it!'.

'You mean now?'

'Why not?'

So I unwrapped the present, and saw what looked an awful lot like a flashlight, except that, where there is supposed to be a light bulb, there was a rather inviting and very real looking vagina. I started to get an erection, and said 'Maybe I will like this thing. But I want to see first how authentic it is.' Susan knew what I meant. She took off her clothes and spread her legs wide. I inserted my finger into Susan's very tight vagina, which incidentally was very moist and smelled delicious, as always. Then I put the same finger into the fake vagina. Well, let me tell you. The feelings were very similar, except that Susan, God bless her, is a little tighter. Now I had to test it.

I slid it onto my now fully erect penis, and moved it up and down, holding it with both hands until I came. What is a pleasant surprise! I came quickly and was left with the most wonderful warm sensation in my balls after what I can only describe as a great orgasm. I sure produced a lot of semen too, much more than I do with a hand job. Of course, jacking off with your hand is fun too. But I see now that gadgets work too, and can make a good thing even better.

'Thank you! Thank you! I love my new toy. I think I will enjoy more than the golf clubs.'

Susan looked relieved, and said 'I knew you'd love it if you just gave it a chance. But you like the golf clubs too, don't you? They were expensive, especially compared to your sex toy.'

'Yes, honey. I like the golf clubs too.'

Susan is great and can never be replaced. But often she is a little too tired for sex when I want it. I was never interested in having affairs. But sometimes I just want to explore my own sexuality by myself and enjoy my own fantasies while I jack off. I can daydream about what I please, and, because I never do anything, my conscience doesn't bother me and I can't get a sexually transmitted disease. I know Susan has her fantasy life too. Fantasy and masturbation are a perfect combination even for people with partners.

'Good night,' Susan said. 'You should sleep well now'. She kissed me good night, and said 'Happy 6oth birthday'. As I drifted off to sleep, I thought, at any rate, now I have something to do that beats golf. Everyone has to have a hobby once they retire. Despite what I said to Susan, I don't think mine will be golf.

I'd be curious to hear comments from other older men who are using male sex toys, whether you experiences are similar to mine.


Posted on: 2006-10-12 00:00:00 | Author: