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Can't Sleep Without Masturbating

I am reminded of myself when reading the above stories, partially because I started masturbating when I was really young, and also because I probably was and am still as obsessed about it as these two authors are.

I discovered masturbation probably when I was around three or four. I don't really know how I discovered it, all I remember is doing it. I can remember sliding forward towards stationary objects such as chair or table legs, or rubbing my waist over the top of a pillow, or rocking my waist over my hands.

I didn't get into much trouble when doing this in front of people. I usually got ignored, but also preferred to do this in my own bedroom, or in the bathroom.

For years, I've been masturbating each morning when I take a shower, and then I masturbate at night before going to bed. And this has been my routine since I was only a little girl.

Lately, I have been wanting to experiment and see what would happen if I would stop masturbating in the shower each morning. It was a little hard at first, and my showers were so much shorter. I missed it at first, but not anymore. Then I wanted to see what would happen if I started doing it again in the mornings, and wow, the feelings were a bit stronger and got to be that way from doing it less often. The evening session I always had also became more enjoyable, possibly from not doing it in the morning, my day would now build up to that point when I could do it in the evening.

I am currently experimenting what would happen if I stopped doing it before bed to see if after a few days it would be more enjoyable yet to do it. But, uh-oh, It's three am and I can't sleep and can't seem to fall asleep without it. I've tried in the past to stop masturbating at night when I've been real tired and didn't have time. But I haven't successfully fallen asleep without masturbating first yet. In fact, I often fall asleep masturbating, only to wake up later on to find my hand still between my legs rubbing away in the middle of the night.

This experiment may not go to well, I do need to get some sleep.

I worry that I may be addicted to masturbation if I can't sleep at night without doing it, and I worry about what this could mean for my future.


Posted on: 2005-10-20 00:00:00 | Author: