An Evening on the Edge

I've been going through a phase of being more curious about men. It coincides this time with a shortage of available contact with womankind, which can push the issue of men or at least leave me in a space where I'm yearning enough to go there. I've had this persistent fantasy of wanting to jack off a guy and watch him cum, so I started posting in an adult list and began getting responses.

A guy named Rob responded and we corresponded for a few weeks, looking for a time we could meet, sharing a few things. I sent him a few of my stories and articles. He turned out to be pretty young, about 21, and had only had sex once, masturbating with another guy, that was it. I asked him a few questions, still via email.

We agreed on the first date that he would watch me masturbate. In a moment of rather consumed erotic desire, I said, here's what I can do for you. I'll let you watch me fuck my ass and cum. So that was our arrangement.

Finally he got over to my place, I think it was a Sunday night. Cute kid, nerdy glasses, he sat on my couch and I sat in my club chair which has the two back legs removed. I asked him a lot of questions. He was pretty shy. I was not feeling the least bit horny, even though I had my chance do something, anything that I wanted. I could have really gone anywhere, he was a virgin, I believed him, and I could try anything he was game for. Anyway, finally, he said, so, well, are we going to do something?

I said, well, okay, so I took a deep breath and a little bit is all it took and the idea of stripping and masturbating in front of him was the most natural thing in the world. That, basically, is what I did. He sat there dressed and I sat back and looked at him and just showed him. I kept remembering that this was just his second erotic experience ever, this young gay man and I did my best to relax. Very hot, its hot to show someone that dimension of feeling and show my face and erect penis.

When I felt the first desire to orgasm, I mentioned it, very trippy to talk openly about that in the moment it happens or might happen. He admitted his desire and said he might try if I helped him.

Finally, finally, he asked if he could undress and I said sure. So here I am, very, very worked up, and him too, and he undressed and began masturbating. I watched and felt and talked to him, pretty close, kind of sitting at his feet. I am a little high and feeling very dreamy and it is dreamy. Very nice to have a man masturbating openly that close to me. I talked to him as he got hornier.

He orgasmed, and it was so sweet. I told him to let it out and feel himself ejaculating and said the kinds of things I would love to hear when I'm cumming. I cannot tell you how good it felt, how surprising and so hot as the thick spurts of come hit the floor as he watched. My god he came so strong for a young virgin.

It was all in slow, suspended motion.

I said to him, 'This is your semen. I'm going to smell your semen.' And I did. It smelled a lot like mine, fresh and like the woods. You have to understand how vulnerable a man is after he's ejaculated. And there I am smelling him and encouraging him to smell himself. So intimate, a little shocking. I held his cum to his nose and said 'smell your semen,' and he did. I asked him if he wanted to drink or taste it and he said no, he had no interest at all, and I totally could empathize. I smelled him again. I considered masturbating with his thick cum, that feels so good you have no idea, but instead, after a while, I massaged it into his belly and said, 'Here's your semen back' kind of marking him with his own scent.

(Oh, what I did not say was that, earlier, when he was just watching me and I was getting horny enough to say or do anything, I said, okay when I cum and drink myself, I want to do it right: assfucked in front of my mirror, a special mirror I use just for that.) So now, basically, it was time for that. After that little scene I was very horny and he was curious. I washed my hands and he dressed and a few minutes later he came into my room dressed and lay on my bed; I was on the floor in front of this mirror and had a dildo I like and I let him watch my face as I squatted over it and straddled it and was fucked. My cock was hard. I fucked myself for a while letting him see and feel, and then I turned around and faced the mirror. Having my ass fucked makes me feel full inside and the orgasm is deeper, more urgent and more satisfying... and I like the feeling of drinking my cum when my ass is fucked, there is a connection (and it feels really good to fill my mouth with cum, totally natural of course).

Anyway, I am sure you can imagine, I was very horny and very nervous, and wanting the pleasure to last forever and wanting a mouth full of my cum all at once. l leaned against my bed and lay back and spread my legs, which were propped high against the wall on either side of the mirror, which was angled in the corner.

Still deeply fucked. Trying to take my time, to be aware of what I was doing (this was to be the first time I would drink my cum in front of another man one on one, or in fact, in front of a man without a woman in the room ever). I began talking to myself and saying stuff to myself like 'I want to drink your semen' and 'I love you' while he watched and then as the pleasure grew and grew and I knew it was going to soon be time to orgasm, I said, 'Show him, show him, show him' and I let go, that was too much, 'show him' and I showed him! I was cumming, very openly, sweetly slipping away from any control, heart roaring, moaning, a LOT of semen pulsing out from a long buildup and a few days of no orgasms and watched my face melt and strange and beautiful and my palm was full of my own cum and I put it to my mouth and sucked it all in.

He is watching all of this in the mirror.

I held it in my mouth and turned toward him and let him see my face with my full mouth (I did not quite have the nerve to open my mouth and show him...). Now comes that moment where I can't believe what I've just done, but there is no point, right? Because I'm sitting there on the floor with my ass fucked and my mouth full of my cum with this person with me and... there is nothing I can change... does it get any more embarrassing, vulnerable, beautiful, erotic, sexy?

And I swallowed myself has he looked at my face.

I have not had a chance to ask him how he felt about that.

Maybe next time we will cum together and drink ourselves together. I could see that being really easy. I would like to do that with a few guys.... to see and show....